Friday, November 30, 2018

2018 SEC Championship Game: Georgia Bulldogs Vs Alabama Crimson Tide

Last Saturday Auburn Head Coach Gus Malzahn thought he had his War Buzzard ready to play some Saban Murderball.  Indeed.  They kept the game close through halftime.  When the teams returned to the field, the Tigers kept it close until the last two minutes of the third quarter when DeVonta Smith caught a 40-yd TD pass from Tua.  From that point forward, Bama kept pouring it on hapless Auburn.

Coach Saban said, “Don’t ask me why, but it doesn’t seem like we had the right kind of energy in the first half.  Don’t know if it was anxiety or what it was, but we seemed to settle down and play better in the second half.”

In the locker room at the half, Saban told his team, “We’re going to have to change the way these guys think and get after them because now they think they can win.”

The college football world is wondering if, based on the games against The Citadel and the “Barners”, the Tide can be beaten.  I will acknowledge that everyone watching the SEC Championship Game who isn’t a Buckeye or a Sooner fan will be rooting for Jawja to beat Bama.

With the Wolverines falling to the Bucknutts 62-39 last Saturday, the College Football Playoff Committee is now forced to have a serious conversation about who will be ranked No. 4 on Sunday, December 2nd, the day after Bama and the Bulldawgs clash in the SEC Championship Game.

If Georgia is defeated, I think Oklahoma gets the fourth spot over the Bucknutts because they were horribly embarrassed by Purdue losing to the Boilermakers 49-20.

I’m putting the cart before horse here.  First, the Tide must decimate the Bulldawgs.  That’ll be one mean feat.

What if Coach Smart makes the game interesting by putting in backup QB Justin Fields at some point in the game?  What if the game suddenly rides on the performance of Bama’s special teams?  Kicker Joseph Bulovas is a dismal 4 for 16 FG attempts and has blown 5 extra point attempts.  Georgia’s Rodrigo Blankenship has been deadly accurate all season long. Georgia is better prepared to meet the Tide’s strength this time around. 

Bulldawg tailback Elijah Holyfield adamantly insists, "Last year has nothing to do with this next game coming up.”  Oh?  Second-and-26 is what people remember the most from last year’s National Championship Game.

The Dawg Nation may want to blot that exhilarating play from their memory, but the Tide faithful carry it with them to this day.  Hell, it’ll live forever in Bama’s storied history.

Jawja’s last win over Bama was way back in 2007.

On Thursday, UGA Alumni tweeted an awkward invitation to all the SEC schools to #BeADawgForADay.  It didn’t turn out well.  Here’s one example from War Buzzard:
The Vegas bookies have Bama as a double-digit favorite against Jawja.  ESPN’s Matchup Predictor gives the Tide a 63.7% chance of victory.

Throw out the stats. The team that plays with the most emotion, most pride and sheer dominance will win this slobberknocker. The 2018 SEC Champions will be my beloved Crimson Tide. 


Wednesday, November 28, 2018

I Say Disinfomation, You Say Misinformation


POTUS calls the bile pouring out of the media "Fake News". But what is really happening? Is it all out and out lies? Completely fabricated stories with no basis in reality? Here's something to chew on.
“Television is altering the meaning of 'being informed' by creating a species of information that might properly be called disinformation. Disinformation does not mean false information. It means misleading information - misplaced, irrelevant, fragmented or superficial information - information that creates the illusion of knowing something, but which in fact leads one away from knowing.” ~ Neil Postman
One of Postman's most influential works is Amusing Ourselves to Death: Public Discourse in the Age of Show Business. In Amusing, Postman argued that by expressing ideas through visual imagery, television reduces politics, news, history, and other serious topics to entertainment. He worried that culture would decline if the people became an audience and their public business a "vaudeville act." Postman also argued that television is destroying the "serious and rational public conversation" that was sustained for centuries by the printing press.

Postman was a progressive, a liberal but in the classic sense and he foresaw the dangers that faced American culture due to manipulation of our news/information providers.

There is no doubt that much of what we see in the MSM is outright manipulation. This is presented through journalism schools as "Advocacy Journalism." Definition:
Advocacy journalism is a genre of journalism that, unlike propaganda, is fact-based, but supports a specific point of view on an issue.
IMHO advocacy journalism accomplishes the exact same purpose as propaganda. It is more insidious and due to the dumbing down of the population, more effective. Out and out lies can be exposed for what they are, but fact-based manipulation just leads to arguments and division.

Monday, November 26, 2018

Flowing Curves Of Beauty


Wife: "I love you."
Me: "Is that you or the wine talking?"
Wife: "That's me talking to the wine."




Friday, November 23, 2018

Auburn Tigers Vs Alabama Crimson Tide: 2018 Iron Bowl

The state of Alabama got two holidays this week:  Thanksgiving Day and the 83rd Iron Bowl. 

The Auburn-Alabama rivalry has always been a heated and bitter contest, but something is coming this time:  REVENGE.

Coach Saban won’t have to remind his players about last year. Nope. No sir.  They’ll want their reckoning.

The Crimson Tide has never lost two in a row to Auburn. Defeat has been followed by a victory scoring an average of 25 points and will likely be up by that much by halftime.

War Buzzard fans, buoyed by their defeat of the Tide in last year’s Iron Bowl contest, believe they can ruin their most hated rival’s chances of getting into the College Football Playoffs.

Did they hear what ESPN analyst Trevor Matich said about Saturday’s Iron Bowl? “Literally, if a spaceship comes down and abducts the entire Alabama team, Auburn would have a chance.”

Head Coach Gus Malzahn is 2-3 against Coach Saban’s Murderball in his six years with the Tigers.

Bama QB Tua Tagovailoa is not Hurts, Blake Sims or Jake Coker.  He broke A.J. McCarron’s single season touchdown record against The Citadel last Saturday passing for 340 yards and 4 TDs. On the season, he’s thrown for 2,865 yards, 31 TDs and just two INTs. He’s also added four rushing TDs.

There are other rivalry games:

No. 13 Florida at Florida State (who cares?)
No. 4 Michigan at No. 10 Ohio State (Go Buckeyes!)
Georgia Tech at No. 5 Georgia (who cares?)
South Carolina at No. 2 Clemson (Go Gamecocks!)
No. 3 Notre Dame at USC (Go Trojans!)


Monday, November 19, 2018

Calling Norman Einstein

The last time the Cleveland Browns won a game was on December 24th, 2016. They finished the 2017 season without a single win making them the second team in league history to finish with a 0–16 record.  Last month Head Coach Hue Jackson got the axe.
Ask any Cleveland fan about their team’s execution and they’ll answer, “I’m in favor of it.”
Browns GM John Dorsey, according to ESPN’s Adam Schefter, is “open to hiring a woman as Cleveland’s next head coach.”
Schefter inferred the team “would like to interview former Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice for the job.”
Former Pro Bowler, Joe Theismann, once said, “Nobody in football should be called a genius.  A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein.”

So, word got back to the team and Dorsey was forced to issue a statement saying, "Our coaching search will be thorough and deliberate, but we are still in the process of composing the list of candidates and Secretary Rice has not been discussed.”
Rice, who has been eyed as an eventual candidate to replace the bungling Roger Goodell as NFL Commissioner, posted to her Facebook account that she was “not ready to coach.” 
To put things in perspective, and I know this is hard for the Dawg Pound peeps, here’s Indianapolis Head Coach Jim Mora back in 2001 after his team stunk up the place losing to the Niners in a game that saw his Colts allow 20 unanswered points while their fourth-year QB, Peyton Manning, tossed four interceptions:

Flowing Curves Of Beauty


My therapist says I need to finish things I start if I ever want to be happy.  So far, I've finished a six pack and a pie.  I feel better already.




Sunday, November 18, 2018

Happy Saladsgiving?

Remember when the vaunted Nate Silver and his election prognosticators at FiveThirtyEight on the morning of Election Day 2016 declared Hillary Clinton had a 71.4 percent chance of being elected president?

Joe Concha of The Hill wrote, “Nate was arrogant.  His numbers were all over the place.  The title of ‘guru’ is now gone.  Silver’s career will survive, but never again will he be held in any revered regard.”

At noon on Sunday, those crystal ball readers tweeted a three-year-old map showing the most disproportionately common Thanksgiving side dishes by region in America.  Turns out there were only 931 respondents.  That’s less than 20 people per state.  I think this thing is bogus and needs a dressing [pun intended].  Are we prepared to then say the most popular dessert on the West Coast is fruitcake?  
Someone replied, “I'm a lifelong Californian who has never had salad on Thanksgiving. This is an odious lie.”  Yet another tweeted, “Why bring a salad to Thanksgiving when you can just step up and directly tell your family that you hate them?”

All I know for sure is you need to have plenty of vegetables on the table: carrot cake, zucchini bread and pumpkin pie.

American humorist Erma Bombeck famously said, “I come from a family where gravy is considered a beverage.”

No matter what side dishes find their way to your Thanksgiving dinner table, here’s to a heaping helping of love, joy and fond memories.

This Guy Is Nuttier Than Rat Crap In A Pistachio Factory

Once upon a time the inhabitants of a community were perfectly satisfied to know which member among them was generally understood to be the village idiot. Nowadays the community feels a need to validate that idiot by electing them to Congress.

Alas, five years ago the voters in California’s 15th Congressional District (the 11th wealthiest district in the country) elected a little maggot to represent them.

I refer to Rep. Eric Swalwell, a 38-year-old combative little ignoramus. 

Nobel Prize winner for literature, George Bernard Shaw once said, “He knows nothing and he thinks he knows everything.  That points clearly to a political career.”

Shaw would certainly know since he wrote “What Socialism Is” in 1890 for the Socialist Fabian Society.

Swalwell’s not crazy because he loathes President Trump.  He’s crazy because he took to Twitter to opine about gun control in a manner that went far afield from the Democrat talking points we’ve become accustomed to hearing.

The Op-Ed piece he wrote for USA Today entitled “Ban assault weapons, buy them back, go after resisters: Ex-prosecutor in Congress” turned into an epic Twitter shitstorm.
Realizing he’d poked a hornet’s nest, Swalwell then tweeted: 
When news reports emerged that U.S. District Court Judge Timothy Kelly granted CNN’s request for a temporary restraining order and preliminary injunction restoring Jim Acosta’s White House hard pass, Swalwell pounced; his little fingers dizzily tweeting: 
Our village idiot didn’t read the full report which clearly said, “[Kelly] did not rule on CNN’s claim that the revocation of the journalist’s pass violated his rights under the First Amendment.”  CNN lawyers told the network more hearings were “likely to take place on the matter in the coming weeks.”

Don’t try to explain things to stupid people.  That’s a job for a jackass whisperer.

UPDATE:  Welcome readers of Bad Blue Uncensored News.

A Walk On The Wild Side

Saturday, November 17, 2018

His Ego Is So Big It Takes Up The Entire State Of Ohio

John Kasich never missed a chance to mention that his dad was a mailman. If he had a nickel for every time he mentioned his father’s job, he might be able to retire with the equivalent of a generous postal service pension. The references have been a staple of his public addresses and interviews for years and invariably made everyone loathe this NeverTrumper.

In March of 2016, “Little Marco” Rubio ended his bid for the presidency.  Kasich found himself stuck in fourth place in a three-man race.  Voters were not flocking to Kasich’s campaign and his irksome refusal to drop out of the race drew the consternation of many in the GOP.

Having earned a paltry 154 delegates and winning only one primary, his home state of Ohio, he reluctantly suspended his campaign two months later.

With the 2018 Midterm Election now over, the 2020 White House race officially gets underway in New Hampshire and the other early primary and caucus states.

The first politician to visit the Granite State was none other than “Pancake Johnny”.  He thought the best way to win votes was to eat his way across America.  His hypnotizing appetite was something to behold.  Now that he’s no longer Ohio’s governor, he’ll have plenty of time to flap his gums and give tutorials on how to eat a pickle.

During a visit to New Hampshire he was asked whether he’d run in 2020:
UPDATE:  Welcome readers of Bad Blue Uncensored News.  A big “thank you” goes to Doug Ross for linking to this post.

UPDATE II:  Welcome readers of Larwyn’s Linx.  We wish everyone who stopped by a Happy Thanksgiving.

Friday, November 16, 2018

Citadel Bulldogs Vs Alabama Crimson Tide

College football Saturdays down South are serious business.  Nothing, but nothing interferes with it.  This, however, is Cupcake Saturday in the SEC so you are cleared to tackle those pesky items on your Honey-Do List.

After the Citadel Bulldogs were crowned 2016 Southern Conference Champions, Head Coach Brent Thompson said of the 2018 schedule which included the Crimson Tide, “These games are important for many reasons and they allow us to provide our cadet-athletes with once-in-a-lifetime experiences.  I’m excited that our team will have the experience of playing in front of more than 100,000 fans against one of the premier teams in college football.”

By any objective measure, this contest will be one of the biggest mismatches of the year in college football. The Citadel rode buses nearly 8 hours from Charleston, SC to Tuscaloosa to be out-manned at virtually every position. For the Bulldogs this game is not about winning; it’s about the money.

One Citadel player, 2006 alum Porter Johnson, chose to have some fun with the overwhelming odds his Dogs face this weekend:
Last week the Mississippi State Bulldogs were the victim of ludicrous officiating by the SEC referees.

On Bama’s first possession of the game there appeared to be a fumble by Damien Harris before his knee touched the ground that was never reviewed.  Minutes later the Tide scored at TD.

At the end of the first half, Missy’s sophomore RB Kylin Hill scored a TD only to have it called back when WR Deddrick Thomas was penalized for an illegal block in the back. Replays shown in real time and slow-motion showed the Tide defender was never touched.  
The booth’s failure to a review a clear fumble and the official’s phantom flag for a penalty that did not happen gave plenty of ammo to the throng of Bama haters who frequently flap their gums claiming it isn’t fair that teams have to compete with Alabama and the refs calling the game.

Mississippi State Athletic Director John Cohen complained to the Conference saying, “I’ve personally communicated with the coordinator of football officials, Steve Shaw, and SEC Commissioner Greg Sankey. Both of them assured me that Saturday’s game with Alabama is being fully reviewed and they also stated that the official issues will be identified swiftly and dealt with directly.”

As a dyed-in-the-wool Bama fan since the 1950s, I cannot defend the zebras sorry officiating nor dispel the charges of “Bama Bias” and “Alabama Collusion”.  This team is either good enough on its own or its not.  The zebras should not do anything to cheapen their season.  There.  I said it.  Now, on to the cupcakes of The Citadel and the impending decimation of War Eagle in the Iron Bowl. 


Thursday, November 15, 2018

Basta La Vista Creepy Porn Lawyer

At 5:50 PM Wednesday afternoon, the scandal sheet TMZ published a report revealing creepy porn lawyer Michael Avenatti had been arrested on charges of felony domestic violence.

Avenatti was released after posting $50,000 bail, at which point, he made a brief public statement claiming he would be “fully exonerated” following an investigation.
Initial reports said the woman involved was Avenatti’s estranged wife Lisa Storie-Avenatti however her attorney disputed the report saying, “Ms. Storie-Avenatti was not subject to any such incident on Tuesday night. Further, she was not at Mr. Avenatti’s apartment on the date that this alleged incident occurred. My client states that there has never been domestic violence in her relationship with Michael and that she has never known Michael to be physically violent toward anyone.”

The woman who actually was involved in the alleged physical altercation reportedly scrambled from the apartment where the incident occurred and was spotted on the sidewalk holding her hands over her eyes while shouting into her cell phone. “I can’t believe you did this to me.”

Five minutes later, Avenatti arrived at the apartment complex and yelled repeatedly, “She hit me first,” then, “This is bullshit, this is fucking bullshit.” The alleged melee occurred after the woman attempted to pick up her belongings and called 911 after tempers ran hot.

“We’re told her face was ‘swollen and bruised’ with ‘red marks’ on both cheeks,” TMZ reports. 

While the creepy porn lawyer is attempting to burnish his credentials as a potential 2020 Democrat presidential candidate, he is facing mounting legal entanglements, including a possible criminal investigation by the Justice Department. Senate Judiciary Committee Chairman Chuck Grassley (R-IA) has asked for a criminal investigation into whether Julie Swetnick and Avenatti conspired to provide false statements to Congress and obstructed a congressional investigation during the confirmation process for Supreme Court Justice Brett Kavanaugh.

Grassley wrote in a letter to the Justice Department that Swetnick and Avenatti made serious allegations that required significant resources to investigate. However, Grassley says information from media interviews and elsewhere indicates their statements “likely contained materially false claims.”

The Vermont Democratic Party canceled Avenatti's appearances for Friday and Saturday following his arrest, and it will refund all ticket sales, according to VDP Communications Director Christopher Di Mezzo.

The decision to cancel the events was made "almost immediately after the news broke," he said.

The creepy porn lawyer’s aspirations may just have suffered a setback.  What a pity. (stifles laughter)

UPDATE:  Welcome readers of Bad Blue Uncensored News. We wish to thank Doug Ross for linking to this post.

Monday, November 12, 2018

Doing His Best Napoleon Impression

Europe’s self-proclaimed “strong man”, Emmanuel Macron, hosted newly elected President Donald Trump in 2017 when he visited France for the July 14th Bastille Day celebration at DĂ´me des Invalides where NapolĂ©on is entombed.

Two months earlier, Macron celebrated his historic presidential victory at the Louvre as the youngest French ruler since NapolĂ©on himself.  He stood beside the Louvre’s Pyramid on the square Cour NapolĂ©on, once the home of the kings of France.  Rather than entering the square to the sounds of “La Marseillaise”, the French national anthem for hundreds of years, he ordered the playing of “Ode to Joy” by German composer Ludwig von Beethoven.

When Russian President Vladimir Putin visited Macron, he hosted him at Versailles, the sumptuous palace that became the symbol of France’s absolute monarchy.

I think you get where I’m going here. Macron equates himself as one of a caste of befeathered emperors and perfumed prince bishops that ruled Europe for centuries. 

It doesn’t end there. Like Louis XIV, the Sun King who said “L'Ă©tat, c'est moi” (I am the state), Macron is egotistical enough to court the Illuminati-esoterica crowd at Bilderberg comparing himself to the Roman god Jupiter who weighs his rare pronouncements carefully and sits above the fray of regular affairs.  What a schmuck.

Eighteen months into his term as France’s president, Macron’s approval ratings continue to slip, with only 26 percent of French people saying they have confidence in him.

The reason the French are disenchanted was outlined in a published report by the Los Angeles Times on October 3, 2017:

“He alienated conservatives by engaging in an ugly public spat with the army, France's most beloved institution, over his proposal to cut nearly $1 billion in defense spending in order to meet EU deficit targets. The army chief, Gen. Pierre de Villiers, resigned in protest after Macron suggested in newspaper interviews that he was angry at having his decisions questioned.”

“Last month, he annoyed liberals when he called opponents of his economic reforms "lazy"—recalling an incident from 2016 when, as Hollande's economy minister, he retorted to a pro-labor demonstrator who jeered at his well-tailored suit: ‘The best way to afford a suit is to work.’"

“The elitist moniker has stuck to Macron as he pushes ahead with his first salvo in the reform battle: undoing some of the protections guaranteed to French workers, perhaps the most pampered labor force in the industrialized world.”

Speaking at the Arc de Triomphe in Paris at a World War I commemoration ceremony attended by President Trump and 70 other world leaders, Macron suggested nationalism could lead to the same death and devastation seen during that war.

“Nationalism is a betrayal of patriotism. By saying our interests first, who cares about the others, we erase what a nation holds dearest, what gives it life, what makes it great and what is essential: its moral values.  I know there are old demons which are coming back to the surface. They are ready to wreak chaos and death. History sometimes threatens to take its sinister course once again.”

You don’t have to be a supporter of President Trump to feel the outrage of such a smug lecture. Maybe Mr. Macron should have first reflected on the nearly 117,000 Americans who made the supreme sacrifice in World War I or the 29,000 who perished on the French coast of Normandy in Operation Overlord on D-Day during World War II who saved his country about nationalism.

American nationalism animated our mighty republic to save France and the world twice during those conflagrations.

Instead of displaying a shred of gratitude for being liberated by the first superpower in world history uninterested in conquest he gave America an imperious dressing down.  My father was on Omaha Beach on D-Day. 

When President Ronald Reagan commemorated the 40th anniversary of D-Day, he stood on the very spot where Allied soldiers had stormed ashore to liberate Europe from the yoke of Nazi tyranny.  Speaking to the veterans who climbed the cliffs of Pointe du Hoc he said, “You are men who in your lives fought for life and left the vivid air signed with your honor.”

On June 5, 1940 Nazi forces penetrated French Gen. Maxime Weygand’s forces on the Somme River and began to march south toward Paris, reaching the capital on June 14.  The city had been abandoned by the French government and the Nazis were allowed to march down the Champs-ÉlysĂ©es as Parisians watched in shock and sadness.

Were it not for America, the French would be speaking German. It’s no wonder an old joke persists even today about the French military:  one of white flags, hands thrust aloft and tails tucked between their legs in retreat.

FOR SALE:  French rifle.  Never fired.  Dropped only once.

Adolf Hitler, accompanied by Albert Speer and other staff members, walks away from the Eiffel Tower after a tour during his visit to Paris in 1940. Hitler's armies took most of France, as well as Belgium and Holland, in May and June of 1940. (Photo by © Hulton-Deutsch Collection/CORBIS/Corbis via Getty Images)



UPDATE:  Welcome readers of Bad Blue Uncensored News. We thank Doug Ross for the linky-love.

Just in Time for Christmas!

Flowing Curves Of Beauty


Being an adult is a lot like a dog going to the vet...you're all excited about the ride until you realize where you are and what's about to happen.




Saturday, November 10, 2018

Poor Planning On Your Part Does Not Constitute An Emergency On My Part

The Bronx Bolshevik, Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, who beat the pants off Democrat Machine Joe Crowley back in June won a seat in the U.S. House of Representatives in the 2018 Midterm Election. 

She now joins hair-brained, dimwitted colleagues Nancy Palsi, Mad Max Waters, Sheila Jackson Lee and Fredrica Wilson, but there’s a glitch.

In an interview with The New York Times published on Thursday, Ocasio-Cortez called the transition into becoming a lawmaker "very unusual, because I can’t really take a salary. I have three months without a salary before I’m a member of Congress. So, how do I get an apartment? Those little things are very real."

She and her “partner” have been “just kind of squirreling away and then hoping that gets me to January.” This “squirreling away” she speaks of─would that be the money she cheated a co-worker out of?

According to the New York Post, Cortez made $560 in tips during the Cinco de Mayo celebration in 2017.  When it came time to split the tips, she only gave the waitress $50.  After complaining to the manager of the bar, Cortez was forced to double the take to $100.

The waitress who was rooked by Cortez said, “It says so much about her character.  From that point on I wouldn’t talk to her.  I couldn’t look at her.”  According to the published report, Cortez could not be reached for comment.

Now, for someone who graduated from Boston University with a major in economics and international relations, you’d think she would plan for her financial future for the long term.

Apparently, like her mentor Sen. Bernie Sanders, she’s an authentic airhead. Former Senator Joe Lieberman said of Cortez, “She seems likely to hurt Congress, America and the Democratic Party.”

Rather than joining the Democratic Socialist Party she should have joined the party made famous by the eccentric Jimmy McMillan of the Rent Is Too Damn High Party.  This fellow is so bizarre, Saturday Night Live featured him in a skit.

Cortez did herself no favors when she posed for an interview in a $3500 ensemble designed by Gabriela Heart and black stilettos from Manolo Blahnik.  At least she wasn’t wearing Chanel.

Like Venezuela’s Nicolas Maduro, once Socialists gain power, they have closets filled with expensive clothes while their countrymen go hungry.  That’s how the Socialism thing works.

Is the wunderkind of the Left too good to sleep in her office like Speaker of the House Paul Ryan, Majority Leader Kevin McCarthy, Reps. Dan Donovan, Gregory Meeks, Lee Zeldin, John Katko and Brian Higgins?

Shoot, she could save anywhere between $25,000 and $30,000 that isn’t claimed at tax time and she would get free cable, electricity and janitorial service.


UPDATE:  Welcome readers of Bad Blue Uncensored News.  We wish to thank our Vets for their service on this Veterans Day weekend and to Doug Ross for linking to this post.