Wednesday, May 24, 2017

Can't Govern, Can't Impeach, Can't MAGA

Here is a sampling:
On May 1, 1981, thousands of protesters marched in Washington to denounce President Reagan's economic and social policies. The event was billed as ''Days of Resistance to Roll Back Reaganism." (Sound familiar?) At the event, at least two speakers called for impeaching Reagan. 
''Our purpose is to turn this country around,'' one said. ''Getting rid of Reagan is the first step.'"
In early 1983, Rep. John Conyers, D-Mich., said Reagan should be impeached "for incompetence." Later that year, he called for impeaching Reagan over his military action in Grenada. 
Jesse Jackson wanted Reagan impeached in 1984 for mining Nicaragua's harbors. Texas Rep. Henry Gonzalez and six other Democrats introduced a resolution to impeach Reagan in 1987 over the Iran-Contra affair. 
Gonzalez pushed to have President George H.W. Bush impeached in 1991 because of the Gulf War. 
Reps. Dennis Kucinich and Robert Wexler introduced 35 articles of impeachment against President George W. Bush in 2004 that centered on the Iraq War, Hurricane Katrina, global warming and the 2004 elections. 
Conyers filed a resolution in 2005 calling for Bush's impeachment, and was still publicly advocating it by 2007. And Kucinich kept pushing for impeachment into Bush's last months in office. 
That's when they aren't twitching over assassination fantasies.  Oh, and every Republican is a moron, incompetent, evil, and hateful.  Every one, if you listened to these folk.   
If they think they want impeachment, they should take a page from the Republicans, who actually succeeded in impeaching Clinton, although not removing him from office, unfortunately.

H/T Daily Time Waster

Tuesday, May 23, 2017

There Is No Excuse

No religion or religious sect is perfect. But the Catholics and Protestants stopped killing each other quite some time ago.

Friday, May 19, 2017

Emit Magazine - Trump/Russian Derangement Edition

Let's recap:

*The last administration sold massive amounts of US uranium to Russia

*Wanted to be BFF with Putin via a cheesy "reset" button

*Rolled over and played dead when Russia invaded Crimea, despite a signed agreement for the US to defend Ukraine against invasion

*Refused to sell defensive arms to the Ukraine which would be used against Russian invaders

*Promised to be more "flexible" in our dealings with Russia after the 2012 elections, and

*When faced with "war crimes" in Syria, ceded control of the situation and allowed Russia greater influence in Syria and the Middle East

And yet, on the basis of a few unsubstantiated media stories, Trump is the one turning the White House into the Kremlin!

Update: Apparently, this idiocy was not even an original idea with Emit, but ripped off Mad Magazine (which has much more credibility!)

Thursday, May 18, 2017

The Robert Mueller Contest

Okaaaay ...

Curmudgeon forgot to lock the liquor cabinet, her ATV is buried in the swan pond and Proof is rummaging through her lingerie drawers (why so many?).

And there's freaking squirrels EVERYWHERE!
So it's

Time for a contest!

As most of you are aware, the DoJ has announced that a Special Counsel has been appointed to investigate possible Russian interference in the 2016 Presidential election. This despite contradictory evidence that:

Special Counsel Bob Mueller is going to have his hands full sifting through the numerous dangling participles of the Democrat's epic election woes saga. Indeed, this investigation will take many months of listening to chattering, prevaricating officials desperately trying to cover their asses avoid changing their address to that of a federal prison.

In preparation for this, Dear Reader, we should exercise due diligence and make an effort to anticipate the evolving narratives sure to arise that government officials will use to: 1) mask the rampant corruption of the Deep State, and 2) insulate the most prominent elected officials who have stood before a national audience and lied.

Now the contest.
Once Curmudgeon returns from her well deserved vacation, the three of us will sweep the squirrel s**t out of the house,  tow the ATV out of the pond, replace all the (cheap) liquor, bury the dead Koi fish and examine the responses entered by the contest participants. I will prime the pump, so to speak, with this:

"It was Putzini all along."
"Comey, you broke my heart!"
Biden: "I'm smaaaht! I can do things!"

Well, not really. Use your imagination.

For bonus points, we have started a Scapegoat Pool.

Who will the Democrats give up to the Mueller Inquisition?  Have no doubt; if Mueller starts to throw Democrats in jail, they will hoot and howl and scream about Political Prejudice and then suggest a token sacrifice or two to throw under the Big Yellow Indictment Bus.

What do you win?
Well, Proof hasn't returned everything from those drawers.

No Co-Inky Dinky

President Trump will be embarking on his first foreign trip on Friday May 19th.  His first stop will be Riyadh, Saudi Arabia before heading on to Jerusalem and Rome.  While in Israel, the president will begin the process of negotiating a peace agreement between the Israelis and Palestinians.  Following his visit to the Vatican, the President will attend a NATO meeting that opens on May 24.  At the conclusion of that meeting, he will travel to Sicily where he will meet with leaders of the G7 on May 26th.

It is not a coincidence that yours truly, Curmudgeon, will be heading out of town on the 18th and will return on May 30.

PT Cruiser One will be co-piloted by Sophie The Wonderdog.  Our mission will be to bird watch at Atalaya Castle and seek the surrender of delicious sea life from a beautiful yacht with massive carbon-intensive diesel engines.  Joining us later will be a friend whom I have not seen in years.  Our itinerary will include oodles of shopping and a spaghetti dinner with all the fixin’s and plenty of handing tasty tidbits under the table to Sophie and her little friends Tika and Teddy. 

The remainder of my itinerary is super-secret.  I like to infuriate Chuck Schumer so my press secretary has purposely been kept out of the loop to prevent any leaks and will no doubt be lambasted on SNL as a result.  In case that North Korean fat kid gets lucky and gets another missile up, my travel agent will contact my personal bodyguard who will deliver my daily brief in a manila envelope sealed with half a roll of duct tape and Gorilla Glue®.

During my hiatus, co-bloggers Proof and Sig94 will be in charge just like Alexander Haig thought he was when Reagan was shot.  They have been given the keys to the liquor cabinet.  I have already notified the local chief of police to monitor Casa de Curmudgeon to insure neither of these guys demolishes the joint.

There will be no tagging the boulders in my rock garden with graffiti.  There will be no peeing in the Koi pond.  There will be no allowing the g-d squirrels to belly up to the bar.  There will be no charging a topless maid service to my credit card.  There will be no ashes, beer cans or peanut shells littering the floor.  There will be no placing calls to phone sex centers and no visiting pay-per-view porn sites on my Internet connection.

Our regular Monday morning feature “Flowing Curves of Beauty” are all queued up, so no worries there.

I hope everyone enjoys a safe and Happy Memorial Day weekend.  Just remember it is a day to honor America’s bravest sons and daughters who answered the call to defend their nation and, in so doing, made the greatest sacrifice of all.

Wednesday, May 17, 2017

Screenshot Of Comey Diary Entry

NOTE FROM OUR ATTORNEYS:  The Disney Frozen® “password” Diary depicted above is not an actual example of a Comey diary entry.  It is an incredibly beautiful simulation.  That we can tell you.  Believe us. The failing New York Times is truly one of the worst newspapers. They knowingly write lies and never even call to fact check. Really bad people!


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