Move over, Jasmine. Here's Princess That's Mine!
Monday, December 31, 2018
Tuesday, December 25, 2018
Monday, December 24, 2018
Flowing Curves Of Beauty Christmas Eve Edition
Girl to her boyfriend: Which do you love more, my pretty face or my
sexy body?
Boyfriend: I love your sense of humor most.
Sunday, December 23, 2018
Thursday, December 20, 2018
Tuesday, December 18, 2018
Oh Yeah, What Do They Say About Liars?
Figures don't lie, but liars don't figure.
Numbers are funny things.
Funny because, like a Spanish transgender cross-dressing drag beauty queen, you can dress them up as you like to make a point.
Even if that point is perverse and a complete lie.
John Stossel presents such a lie.
Monday, December 17, 2018
Flowing Curves Of Beauty
Don’t get too excited...that trail of clothes leading to my
bedroom just means I dropped them on my way from the dryer.
Sunday, December 16, 2018
Wednesday, December 12, 2018
Monday, December 10, 2018
Flowing Curves Of Beauty
Apparently,
"whiskey and wild women" was not the answer they were looking for
when they asked me “What are your weaknesses?” at a job interview.
Sunday, December 9, 2018
Saturday, December 8, 2018
The Motion Picture Academy Of Arts And Sciences Keeps Trying To Pick Up A Turd By The Clean End
Ever since Billy
Crystal passed the baton as emcee of the Oscars in 2004, the Academy has
struggled to find the right person to host what has become garbage television.
Those who succeeded
Crystal have vowed never to do it again.
Contrast that with the glory days of the Oscars when Johnny Carson
hosted five times, Crystal nine times and Bob Hope an unprecedented eighteen
times.
Nowadays, the host is expected to boost the ratings of the annual
ceremony that spent 20 years kissing Harvey Weinstein’s ass, be funny without
being tawdry, topical without being controversial and politically savvy without
being too partisan.
Comedian Kevin Hart stepped
down as Oscars host just two days after he was named in the role,
amid anger over a series of mostly deleted homophobic tweets he posted from
2009 to 2011.
Hollywood is full of
hypocrites and knee-jerk political activism with deep ties to the Democrat
Party and I think its hysterically funny the Academy is scrambling to find a “suitable
candidate” amid concerns the ceremony’s ratings continue to sink like a stone.
Maybe Hollywood should enter
into a contract with Boston Dynamics to create a funnybot that would supply
inoffensive humor to the perpetually aggrieved or better still, they could stop
giving themselves so many meaningless awards.
The Babylon Bee tweeted
an interesting solution:
Oscars To Be Hosted By Boom Box Playing Inoffensive, Calming Ambient Noisehttps://t.co/amZHJfvs83 pic.twitter.com/dLkDK3qVD2— The Babylon Bee (@TheBabylonBee) December 7, 2018
Friday, December 7, 2018
Pearl Harbor: Someday All Of Them Will Be Gone
After 77 years, the story of the mighty battleship has been
told again and again: how it took heavy fire, how a bomb blew it apart,
how it sank into the harbor.
To this day, the ship still weeps for her dead.
The USS Arizona had 1.4
million gallons of fuel on board when she went down. About a quart and a half a
day bubbles up from below. Pearl Harbor survivors call the seepage “black
tears.” It’s eerie to see and, in a strange way, a seemingly tangible
connection to those who lie below.
About 300 USS Arizona
sailors survived Japan’s surprise attack.
In the past, survivors have rung the bell as
part of Pearl Harbor Day ceremonies, but this year, none
of the five remaining survivors will make the trip to Pearl Harbor due to
health issues.
Two years ago, to mark
the 75th anniversary, four of the survivors made the trip to Pearl
Harbor as the remains of two of their fallen crewmates were interred in
the sunken ship's wreckage.
A little over a decade ago, there were around 6 million
living World War II veterans; soon they will all be gone.
On December 7th, 1941
they were 18 and 19-year-olds, fully committed to sacrificing their lives for family
and country. We may never see their kind of patriotism again.
The country just laid to rest the last veteran of World War II to serve
as president and a fellow World War II veteran, 95-year-old Sen. Bob
Dole, had to be helped from his wheelchair to stand and salute the flag-draped
coffin of President George H.W. Bush.
As the Greatest Generation
leaves us, they take with them a sense of commitment, duty and grace that might
be impossible to replace.
UPDATE: Welcome readers of Bad Blue Uncensored
News. Thank you Doug Ross for
linking to this post and, if you are a veteran, thank you for your service.
Thursday, December 6, 2018
The Weekly Standard: A Wave Hit It And The Front Fell Off
The Weekly Standard, [clears
throat] the “conservative magazine” that has stubbornly clung to an anti-Trump
stance, is expected to fold unless an investor swoops in to save it.
Media DC, a subsidiary
of Philip Anschutz’s Clarity Media Group, did nothing on Wednesday to tamp down
reports of the Weekly Standard’s imminent demise.
The Chairman of Media DC has
asked to meet with Editor-In-Chief Stephen F. Hayes late next week and wants the
entire staff of the publication to be available for the meeting.
Writers for Cap’n Bill’s
cruise line and toilet paper dispenser have written fundraising copy for disgraced
FBI agent Peter Strzok, called for gun control, praised censorship of
conservatives and endorsed pro-abortion Democrats.
Cap’n Bill himself has
said he is building a "war
machine" within the Republican Party to challenge President Trump's
2020 reelection campaign with possible candidates Ohio Governor John “The
Mailman’s Son” Kasich, Sen. Jeff “Cuck” Flake and Sen. Ben “Turncoat” Sasse of
Nebraska.
Even to this casual
observer, Kristol and his dreary band of NeverTrump foot soldiers pray
incessantly the Mueller probe will lead to the impeachment and removal of the
president.
I look forward with great delight to the sinking of the
S.S. Cuck.
UPDATE: Welcome readers of Bad Blue Uncensored
News. We are honored once again by
the linky-love of Doug Ross.
Wednesday, December 5, 2018
Destroying Childhood Innocence During The Holiday Season
According to a
published report from Tap
Into Parsippany, social media was steaming and Montville, NJ parents were
fuming when a parent whose child is a first grader at Cedar Hill Elementary in
Towaco posted onto the Montville Moms Facebook Page Nov. 29 that a substitute
teacher identified only as “Ms. M” had told the children in the class that
there was no such thing as Santa.
One mom wrote she was
furious after the substitute teacher “took it upon herself” to tell the class
of six-year-olds Santa was not real.
“The children began
yelling that everything is real and she continued by saying that the elves and
reindeer aren’t real either,” she wrote. “Nothing is real! My daughter is
completely heartbroken!”
“Oh, it wasn’t just
Santa─it was the Easter bunny, tooth fairy, leprechauns, everything,” wrote another.
“She told the children, ‘your parents buy all your gifts.’ My daughter
literally said, ‘she took away our imagination.’”
Angry parents on the
thread, both with school children and without, were calling for the substitute
teacher’s firing. Some called her the Grinch; another commenter called it
“ignorance, devastation, and heartlessness.” Many said it was sad to ruin
Christmas for children at such a young age. Some suggested that the class
should have a visit from St. Nick himself.
Cedar Hill Principal
Michael Raj sent a letter to the parents of children in that class which said, “I wanted to make you
aware of a situation that occurred today in your child’s classroom. During the
course of the day, a substitute teacher apparently announced to the class that
Santa was not real. Once I became aware of the situation, I immediately spoke
to the substitute teacher regarding her poor judgment in making this
proclamation to [the class].
“As a father of four
myself, I am truly aware of the sensitive nature of this announcement. On
behalf of Cedar Hill School, I apologize for this incident. I am sending this
letter so that you are aware of this situation and if the conversation comes up
at home over the next few days you can take appropriate steps to maintain the
childhood innocence of the holiday season.”
When contacted for
comment, Superintendent of Schools René Rovtar said that “the incident is under
investigation. I am troubled and disheartened by this incident. The
childhood wonder associated with all holidays and traditions is something I
personally hold near and dear in my own heart.”
The mom who first
mentioned the situation on Facebook said her daughter doesn’t believe the
substitute teacher. She took her daughter to visit Santa as part of the Towaco
Shop Hop event and her daughter is happy.
“I told her [the sub]
is Krampus’ [Santa’s evil counterpart] helper and will not be returning. She believes me.”
UPDATE: Welcome readers of Bad Blue Uncensored
News. We are grateful to Doug Ross
for linking to this post.
Some Kneel, Others Stand
Former
Sen. Bob Dole paid his respects to the late President George H.W. Bush on
Tuesday afternoon and was helped out of his wheelchair so he could stand and
salute the coffin.
The 95-year-old can no longer walk. An aide lifted him
from behind so the former senator could be upright to salute Bush, a fellow
World War II veteran.
Dole then sat in his wheelchair for a few moments,
blinking back tears, as he stared at the flag-draped coffin containing the
remains of his fellow member of the Greatest Generation.
UPDATE: Welcome
readers of Bad Blue
Uncensored News. Thanks to Doug Ross
for linking to this post.
Tuesday, December 4, 2018
With Paris Ablaze Macron Gets His Ass Handed To Him
Russian Nobel Prize
winner for literature, Aleksandr
Solzhenitsyn said, “You only have power over people as long as you don’t
take everything away from them. But when
you’ve robbed a man of everything, he’s no longer in your power─he’s free
again.”
France is experiencing
the kind of unrest that many agree is the worst since 1968 as the population
seems to be dividing into those who prosper and those who struggle to keep
their heads above water. For many struggling French citizens, a car is not a
luxury or an indulgence but a precondition of being able to work.
The Macron Administration’s
increase in the country’s fuel tax was the straw that broke the camel’s
back. The proposed fuel tax would cost
the average Jacques hundreds of Euros a year.
Monsieur Macron has never personally experienced the need to make ends
meet on a budget already stretched to the max.
The riots have evolved into a broader anti-Macron uprising. Little Napoleon’s approval rating fell to 23%
in a poll conducted late last week. That’s
down 6 points from the previous month.
You’ll recall last
month France’s little egomaniac gave a smug lecture
to President Trump during the Centennial of World War I. Speaking at the Arc de
Triomphe, Macron suggested nationalism could lead to the same death and
devastation seen during that war.
“Nationalism is a
betrayal of patriotism. By saying our interests first, who cares about the
others, we erase what a nation holds dearest, what gives it life, what makes it
great and what is essential: its moral values. I know there are old
demons which are coming back to the surface. They are ready to wreak chaos and
death. History sometimes threatens to take its sinister course once again.”
It is becoming harder
for the EU’s “Obama” to present himself on the world stage as a progressive
champion who will lead the fight against populism and nationalism if barricades
are burning in Paris and protestors slam his government as an
arrogant elite.
After his return from
the G20 Summit in Buenos Aires, Macron surveyed the damage caused by gilet jaunes
[yellow vests] at the Arc de Triomphe as street cleaners worked to scrub away
graffiti urging: “Macron Demission”
[resign].
They needn’t have
bothered. A small crowd gathered to shout it at Macron anyway. Someone even managed to egg him.
The underlying problem
in France is the same one faced by many countries, some to an even greater
extent: namely of budgets, both public and private, that are never balanced,
and of the consumption of more than is produced.
Macron had vowed to
“stay the course without ceding to demagogy.” But the gilets jaunes have
provoked a surprise crisis that will undoubtedly define his presidency. As they
persist, he is increasingly desperate to appease them, even at a loss of revenues and face. On
Tuesday, Édouard Philippe, the Prime Minister, announced a raft of conciliatory
measures, including a six-month suspension of gas taxes, a promise to make sure
that electricity prices don’t go up over the winter and a “national debate” on
issues of taxation and expenditure. “No tax is worth endangering the unity of
the nation,” he said.
The European
Parliamentary elections are coming up in May of 2019. Macron knows the elections will be a
referendum not only on him, but also on the values of globalism, centrism and
environmentalism, of which he has positioned himself as an international
defender.
I am glad that my friend @EmmanuelMacron and the protestors in Paris have agreed with the conclusion I reached two years ago. The Paris Agreement is fatally flawed because it raises the price of energy for responsible countries while whitewashing some of the worst polluters....— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) December 4, 2018
UPDATE: Welcome readers of Bad Blue Uncensored
News. We are grateful to Doug Ross
for linking to this post.
Monday, December 3, 2018
Flowing Curves Of Beauty
WARNING: If you get a tweet or an email titled "Nude photo of
Nancy Pelosi," do not open it! It
contains a nude photo of Nancy Pelosi.
Sunday, December 2, 2018
Saturday, December 1, 2018
On The Passing Of President George H. W. Bush
He took office with the
humility that was his hallmark.
"Some see
leadership as high drama, and the sound of trumpets calling, and sometimes it
is that," he said. "But I see history as a book with many pages, and
each day we fill a page with acts of hopefulness and meaning. The new breeze
blows, a page turns, the story unfolds."
George H.W. Bush was the
last veteran of World War II to serve as president. He was a consummate public
servant and a statesman who helped guide the nation and the world out of a
four-decade-long Cold War that carried the threat of nuclear annihilation.
Flying ace and
record-setting test pilot, Gen. Chuck Yeager, tweeted
his wish that he say “Hello” to his wife Barbara as she welcomed him home, “She
sure looked out for me during your inaugural parade.”
The elder Bush was an
Eisenhower Republican, whose prudence was displayed first when the Berlin Wall
came down and when Saddam Hussein invaded Kuwait.
Bush earned the lasting
admiration of a discerning posterity, a judgment more important than the one
rendered by the undiscerning electorate that in 1992 limited him to one term.
Bush signed into law
more than a dozen major pieces of domestic legislation during his single term,
including the 1990 budget bill, energy deregulation, the Clean Air Act, the 1990 farm bill, his crime bill, the 1991 Civil Rights Act and the Americans With Disabilities Act.
He also produced the
first set of national performance goals to spur the improvement
of education in our K-12 schools, and he passed precedent-setting child-care legislation and led the
effort to resuscitate the savings-and-loan industry,
including an overhaul of the Federal Deposit Insurance Corp. after the system’s
collapse.
Family spokesman Jim McGrath
said the former president died shortly after 10 PM Friday, nearly eight months
after the death of his wife of 73 years, Barbara Bush.
President Trump issued
a statement while in Buenos Aires, Argentina, for the G20 summit and the White
House immediately noted the passing of Bush by ordering the flag be lowered to half-staff.
John Sununu, who was Chief
of Staff to President George H.W. Bush, noted “he [Bush] always considered Lou
Gehrig to be one of his greatest heroes.
No doubt, this admiration stemmed in part from Bush’s own baseball
career. Like Gehrig, Bush played as a
left-handed first baseman for Yale. But more substantially, Gehrig’s career
closely mirrored that of Bush. Gehrig
played in the shadow of the legendary Babe Ruth, much like Bush did in the
shadow of his partner Ronald Reagan. And
like Gehrig, Bush operated more comfortably as the soft-spoken member of his
partnership. As he said in his 1988 RNC
convention acceptance speech: ‘I am a quiet man, but I hear the quiet people
others don’t.’”
Sununu added, “As
president, George H.W. Bush laid a solid foundation for his successors to build
on. Whether we have the fortitude and discipline to eventually do so remains to
be seen.”
“In any case, the world
will miss a great president. And I will miss a great friend.”
Naval Aviation mourns the passing of our 41st President, George H.W. Bush, a Naval Aviator, statesman, and humble public servant. His legacy lives on in those who don the cloth of our great nation and in the mighty warship which bears his name, @CVN77_GHWB. May he Rest In Peace. pic.twitter.com/0COuk6veDV— flynavy (@flynavy) December 1, 2018
Friday, November 30, 2018
2018 SEC Championship Game: Georgia Bulldogs Vs Alabama Crimson Tide
Last Saturday Auburn
Head Coach Gus Malzahn thought he had his War Buzzard ready to play some Saban
Murderball. Indeed. They kept the game close through
halftime. When the teams returned to the
field, the Tigers kept it close until the last two minutes of the third quarter
when DeVonta Smith caught a 40-yd TD pass from Tua. From that point forward, Bama kept pouring it
on hapless Auburn.
Coach Saban said, “Don’t
ask me why, but it doesn’t seem like we had the right kind of energy in the first
half. Don’t know if it was anxiety or
what it was, but we seemed to settle down and play better in the second half.”
In the locker room at
the half, Saban told his team, “We’re going to have to change the way these
guys think and get after them because now they think they can win.”
The college football
world is wondering if, based on the games against The Citadel and the
“Barners”, the Tide can be beaten. I
will acknowledge that everyone watching the SEC Championship Game who isn’t a
Buckeye or a Sooner fan will be rooting for Jawja to beat Bama.
With the Wolverines
falling to the Bucknutts 62-39 last Saturday, the College Football Playoff Committee
is now forced to have a serious conversation about who will be ranked No. 4 on
Sunday, December 2nd, the day after Bama and the Bulldawgs clash in the SEC
Championship Game.
If Georgia is defeated,
I think Oklahoma gets the fourth spot over the Bucknutts because they were
horribly embarrassed by Purdue losing to the Boilermakers 49-20.
I’m putting the cart
before horse here. First, the Tide must
decimate the Bulldawgs. That’ll be one mean
feat.
What if Coach Smart
makes the game interesting by putting in backup QB Justin Fields at some point
in the game? What if the game suddenly
rides on the performance of Bama’s special teams? Kicker Joseph Bulovas is a dismal 4 for 16 FG
attempts and has blown 5 extra point attempts.
Georgia’s Rodrigo Blankenship has been deadly accurate all season long.
Georgia is better prepared to meet the Tide’s strength this time around.
Bulldawg tailback
Elijah Holyfield adamantly insists, "Last year has nothing to do with this
next game coming up.” Oh? Second-and-26 is what people remember the
most from last year’s National Championship Game.
The Dawg Nation may
want to blot that exhilarating play from their memory, but the Tide faithful
carry it with them to this day. Hell, it’ll
live forever in Bama’s storied history.
Jawja’s last win over Bama was way back in 2007.
On Thursday, UGA Alumni tweeted an awkward
invitation to all the SEC schools to #BeADawgForADay. It didn’t turn out well. Here’s one example from War Buzzard:
— Auburn University (@AuburnU) November 29, 2018
The Vegas bookies have
Bama as a double-digit favorite against Jawja.
ESPN’s Matchup Predictor gives the Tide a 63.7% chance of victory.
Throw out the stats. The
team that plays with the most emotion, most pride and sheer dominance will win
this slobberknocker. The 2018 SEC Champions will be my beloved Crimson Tide.
Wednesday, November 28, 2018
I Say Disinfomation, You Say Misinformation
POTUS calls the bile pouring out of the media "Fake News". But what is really happening? Is it all out and out lies? Completely fabricated stories with no basis in reality? Here's something to chew on.
“Television is altering the meaning of 'being informed' by creating a species of information that might properly be called disinformation. Disinformation does not mean false information. It means misleading information - misplaced, irrelevant, fragmented or superficial information - information that creates the illusion of knowing something, but which in fact leads one away from knowing.” ~ Neil Postman
One of Postman's most influential works is Amusing Ourselves to Death: Public Discourse in the Age of Show Business. In Amusing, Postman argued that by expressing ideas through visual imagery, television reduces politics, news, history, and other serious topics to entertainment. He worried that culture would decline if the people became an audience and their public business a "vaudeville act." Postman also argued that television is destroying the "serious and rational public conversation" that was sustained for centuries by the printing press.
Postman was a progressive, a liberal but in the classic sense and he foresaw the dangers that faced American culture due to manipulation of our news/information providers.
There is no doubt that much of what we see in the MSM is outright manipulation. This is presented through journalism schools as "Advocacy Journalism." Definition:
Advocacy journalism is a genre of journalism that, unlike propaganda, is fact-based, but supports a specific point of view on an issue.
IMHO advocacy journalism accomplishes the exact same purpose as propaganda. It is more insidious and due to the dumbing down of the population, more effective. Out and out lies can be exposed for what they are, but fact-based manipulation just leads to arguments and division.
Monday, November 26, 2018
Sunday, November 25, 2018
Friday, November 23, 2018
Auburn Tigers Vs Alabama Crimson Tide: 2018 Iron Bowl
The state of Alabama got
two holidays this week: Thanksgiving Day
and the 83rd Iron Bowl.
The Auburn-Alabama
rivalry has always been a heated and bitter contest, but something is coming
this time: REVENGE.
Coach Saban won’t have
to remind his players about last year. Nope. No sir. They’ll want their reckoning.
The Crimson Tide has
never lost two in a row to Auburn. Defeat has been followed by a victory scoring
an average of 25 points and will likely be up by that much by halftime.
War Buzzard fans, buoyed
by their defeat of the Tide in last year’s Iron Bowl contest, believe they can ruin
their most hated rival’s chances of getting into the College Football Playoffs.
Did they hear what ESPN
analyst Trevor Matich said about Saturday’s
Iron Bowl? “Literally, if a spaceship comes down and abducts the entire Alabama
team, Auburn would have a chance.”
Head Coach Gus Malzahn
is 2-3 against Coach Saban’s Murderball in his six years with the Tigers.
Bama QB Tua Tagovailoa
is not Hurts, Blake Sims or Jake Coker.
He broke A.J. McCarron’s single season touchdown record against The
Citadel last Saturday passing for 340 yards and 4 TDs. On the season, he’s
thrown for 2,865 yards, 31 TDs and just two INTs. He’s also added four rushing
TDs.
There are other rivalry games:
No. 13 Florida at Florida State (who cares?)
No. 4 Michigan at No. 10 Ohio State (Go Buckeyes!)
Georgia Tech at No. 5 Georgia (who cares?)
South Carolina at No. 2 Clemson (Go Gamecocks!)
No. 3 Notre Dame at USC (Go Trojans!)
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