Sunday, February 7, 2016

Supernatural Omens Abound for Impending Broncos Victory in Super Bowl 50

Gruntington Post [Mountain View, CA] - The crew chief assigned to maintain the Navy jet being prepared to fly over Levi's Stadium during Super Bowl 50 is becoming more and more convinced that God is telling him the Broncos are going to be victorious.
At first, Staff Sgt. Bill Charmen was deeply upset about being assigned to maintain this aircraft at NAS Moffet Field for "a pointless 8-second flight."  It was his day off, and he had a party to attend.
"But then the signs started happening.  The first thing was, all the teal blue LEDs burnt out on the weapons control display.  It didn't stop us.  We don't plan on firing the gun during the game, you  know?  But then there was the DAB unit.  That's a Digital Airborne Buffering computer for queueing up all the battle tasks while in the air.  Sucker just blew up when we fired up the APUs for the first time!  Smoke in the cockpit and everything."
The deciding factor, apparently, was the color of the sky Saturday night when their aviator took the plane up for a shakedown flight.  "It was orange.  Totally Broncos orange.  And the Santa Cruz mountains were deep blue.  You just can't make this stuff up."

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