Showing posts with label thoughts on COVID-19 quarantine. Show all posts
Showing posts with label thoughts on COVID-19 quarantine. Show all posts

Saturday, April 25, 2020

Saturday Satire

I have a confession to make to our readers.  I have been preoccupied with a group of tweeters known as Smug Minions.  Out of the blue on March 5th, I was approached to join a group of Twitter trolls aligned with conservative @ComfortablySmug.  I have spent a lot of time getting to know as many minions as I can.  On Wednesday, I participated in the very first online #TopMinionTrivia game.  There were six rounds of ten questions each.  Nearly all of the questions were impossible to Google.  You either knew the answer or you didn’t.  The final round was a series of 12 screenshots from iconic movies where the image was reversed and the faces of the characters were completely removed from the picture.  The team I was on came in 7th out of 13 teams.  It was bunches of fun.
You see the little hat on the minion pictured above?  I came across a tweet two weeks ago for that cool hat and I just had to have it.  The mailman delivered it to me yesterday. It’s badass and all the cool kids want one now.

It features an array of four battle ribbons:  Maintaining Wi-Fi Connection, Corona Survival, Hand Sanitization and Toilet Paper Shortage Survival. 


With the so-called bombshell video that surfaced about Creepy Joe Biden’s alleged sexual assault of Tara Reade, another piece of the puzzle came to light as well.  If you ever wondered what Joe was really doing in those photographs where he is seen burying his face in women’s hair, wonder no more!
This week’s ‘Rona Rallies have been especially brutal for lefty journos who’ve attended the White House Taskforce briefings.  Trump savaged each one mercilessly.


When President Trump discussed UV lighting as a way to fight the COVID-19 virus on Thursday, the press poodles went apeshit crazy claiming the President’s followers would rush to stores to buy Lysol™ to inhale as a way to combat the virus.  This prompted the basement-dwelling Biden to tweet his admonition and so did Granny Clinton.  I couldn’t let that go.
In an Oval Office ceremony on Friday, the President signed legislation providing $484 billion to replenish a popular small business lending program and support hospitals and COVID-19 testing amid the coronavirus pandemic.  It was during the ceremony that pool reporters gave him a ration of shit over his comments from the day before.

He told reporters he was being “sarcastic” when he appeared to ponder the idea of disinfectant injections as a way of combating the Chopsticky Sicky disease. The manufacturers of Lysol™ issued a public statement declaring, “As a global leader in health and hygiene products, we must be clear that under no circumstance should our disinfectant products be administered into the human body (through injection, ingestion or any other route).”

WTF? Do they picture us standing on line at the store with toilet bowl cleaner, Swiffer WetJet refills, mildew remover, grout whitener and roof sealant just in case the President suggests one of those products will treat the Chinese virus?  Get a grip people.


The Democrat Media Complex is always at the ready to criticize the Trump Administration and this week they pushed fake news about a labradoodle dog breeder Secretary of Health and Human Services Alex Azar assigned to be his Chief of Staff.  They said he was tapped to head the day-to-day government response to COVID-19.  That was a damned lie.

The Dallas Morning News called them out on it saying, “Brian (Harrison) was a no-brainer pick.  His private sector experience is irrelevant…he was a completely known commodity who had extensive experience.”

He’s been in government service since 2006 working in the Bush Administration in both the Department of Defense and HHS. He’s been in the Trump Administration since 2018.


And finally…
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Saturday, April 18, 2020

Saturday Satire

On Thursday the White House unveiled guidelines for “Opening Up America Again” outlining a phased approach to restoring normal commerce and services, but only for places with strong testing and seeing a decrease in COVID-19 cases.

In the days before this announcement, President Trump was savagely destroying the Democrat Media Complex.


President Trump was challenged at Monday's coronavirus press briefing for the way his administration has responded to the coronavirus crisis when he played a video criticizing the media’s reactions throughout this Chop Sticky Sicky pandemic. It was a bitch-slap of epic proportion.

So effective was the video that CBS White House Correspondent Paula Reid argued disrespectfully with the President asking what he did with the time after he ordered a ban on travel to the United States for anyone coming from China and Europe in January and the initialization of his Administration’s response to the outbreak.

What did you do with the time that bought you?  The video has a complete gap for the month of February,” she snarled.  “Are these rants supposed to make people feel confident?”

The timeline provided great detail of every step the Trump Administration took to slow the spread and prevent hospitals from being overwhelmed with active cases of the disease.

"Look, look, you know you're a fake. You know that. Your whole network, the way you cover it is fake. And most of you, not all of you, but the people are wise to you. That's why you have a lower approval rating than you ever had before," Trump said.


At Tuesday's coronavirus press briefing, President Trump announced he was halting U.S. funding of the World Health Organization (WHO) after several errors were made which shielded China from scrutiny and the pissing and moaning from the press went into effing overdrive.

In 2018-19, the U.S. contributed nearly $900 million to WHO's budget. That was about one-fifth of the organization's $4.4 billion budget for those years.

A more detailed WHO budget document provided by the U.S. mission in Geneva showed that in 2019, the United States provided $452 million, including nearly $119 million in assessed funding. In its most recent budget proposal from February, the Trump administration called for slashing the U.S. assessed funding contribution to the WHO to $57.9 million.

During the briefing, CNN’s Jim Acosta shared via Twitter a running list of "scapegoats" he accused the President of blaming. "Scapegoats blamed by Trump for Coronavirus pandemic: World Health Organization, Members of News Media, Democrats in Congress, Governors, (Not himself)," Acosta tweeted later adding, “Other scapegoats blamed by Trump: China, Obama Administration.”

Jim Acosta loves nothing more than Jim Acosta and he is totally oblivious to the fact he makes everyone in the press look bad and is actually helping the President get re-elected.


Also on Tuesday, The World’s Most Dangerous Community Organizer endorsed Joe Biden’s candidacy for President.  Speculation began to swirl on the Twitter machine about who Corn Pop’s nemesis would pick to be his running mate. The top picks were Pocahontas and Kamala “Spank Me” Harris. 


I had a lot of fun Thursday poking fun at the idiots running Biden’s digital campaign.  The geniuses put up a website encouraging Sleepy Joe’s supporters to help him come up with a code for his campaign.  You never intervene when your enemy is destroying himself but I took pity on the bumbling fool.
The same clueless dolts were also encouraging Joe’s supporters to create their own avatar declaring they were on Team Joe.  Talk about a disaster.  A bajillion people had a heyday with this one.  So did yours truly. 
Friday, April 17th was Jim Acosta’s birthday.  Communist China celebrated the illustrious day for its chief mouthpiece.  2020 is, after all, the Year of the Rat.  I shit you not. 


One of the richest members of Congress, Nancy Pelosi, went on late night TV to share with America how’s she coping during the awful mess China wrought on the world.  She did so from her ivory tower perched on a barstool in her kitchen.  She gave us a tour of the freezer chocked full of $13-a-pint Jeni’s gourmet chocolate ice cream found in her $24,000 fridges all while cheering on her Democrat minions for blocking desperately needed coronavirus relief for small businesses.

Many are confused as to why this woman would act this way.  Wonder no more. I have the answer:


#BatAppreciationDay was trending on Twitter yesterday.  Again, I shit you not.  Here is where I quote the evil Vizzini from The Princess Bride wherein he says, “I don't think that word means what you think it means.”

At least four federal class-action lawsuits have been filed against the Chinese government that aim to recover trillions of dollars in damages for what plaintiffs allege is China's failure to contain the coronavirus outbreak and notify the international community about its dangers.

The plaintiffs claim that the Chinese government intentionally misled the international community about the coronavirus and its devastating medical and economic consequences.

 I’m a boomer so I used Saturday Night Fever as my way of pointing to the cavalier manner in which Red China danced around for more than two months before saying a peep.  I like what one person said:  “This is China’s Chernobyl moment.”

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Saturday, April 11, 2020

Saturday Satire

Just like every week since Donald Trump became the 45th President of the United States, the news has come in so hot and heavy it's like trying to drink water from a fire hose.

And like every week, we’ve seen the Democrat Media Complex lose their shit over the President’s Coronavirus Task Force briefings.

It’s been three weeks since the nation was asked to stay at home to slow the spread of the Chinese Lung Rot. Folks like you and me with gumption and grit have witnessed the weaklings in the herd show us precisely why they are the weaklings.  I have chronicled just a few of this week's “moments” here.  It’s my way of pointing and laughing at the “Covidiots”.


The Chinese people have been making the comparison between Xi Jinping and Winnie the Pooh since at least 2015.  Where some see harmless fun, Beijing sees it as a way to undermine the dignity of President Xi.  The portly yellow bear was added to Communist China’s internet search blacklist.

So, when a photograph emerged yesterday of a swaddled newborn baby from China wearing a face shield I poked the “bear”.  Is this the Ministry of Propaganda’s work to make us think the Chinese are now super-duper careful about the global pandemic they started?  Spare me.


Remember when the NBA kowtowed to the Red Chinese while millions protested in Hong Kong? Americans sat up and took notice when brave young people were shown waving the American flag and singing our national anthem in the streets.  Houston Rockets General Manager, Daryl Morey innocently tweeted an image that infuriated China.  It read, “Fight for freedom, stand with Hong Kong.”

China’s state broadcaster, CCTV, said it would suspend broadcasts of the NBA’s preseason games. Enter FCC Commissioner Brendan Carr (pictured thunderdunking) who publicly shamed a Chinese government mouthpiece who suggested on Twitter that U.S. officials should visit China to experience “freedom”.  Carr accepted the offer adding he first wanted to speak with the brave journalists and doctors who risked their lives to warn the world about the coronavirus but were quickly “disappeared”.


I could have pictured these two in straitjackets but felt that’s been overdone. So I went with skull helmets to depict how drain-bamaged they are.

Longtime Democrat strategist fossil James Carville claimed Wednesday on MSNBC, "This thing in Wisconsin was one of the most awful things I've ever seen in my life," referring to the controversy over whether to postpone Wisconsin’s primary election due to the pandemic. "The extent that they will go to hold onto power—it was all about one Supreme Court seat in Wisconsin—they will kill people to stay in power, literally."

The Washington Post’s paint chip eating “conservative” Jennifer Rubin tweeted, “If Biden is serious about winning he needs to accuse Trump of willingness to kill people.”

I got it.  Biden needs to lie his ass off.  These people are possessed of the devil.



Speaking of Biden, he continues his quest for relevancy by broadcasting from his home studio basement.  These cringeworthy attempts to be part of the electoral conversation are rife with incomplete sentences, bouts of coughing reminiscent of Hillary’s and afterwards touching his face.  Biden has Democrats in a full-on panic.

New York Governor Andrew Cuomo’s daily coronavirus press conferences have captivated audiences across the nation.

A poll conducted April 3-6 commissioned by the conservative pro-market Club For Growth and shared with the New York Post found 56% of Democrats prefer Cuomo for president instead of poor old Sleepy Joe.  That’s a 12-point margin and well outside the 4.8% margin of error.  The poll showed Hispanics, young people, women and self-identified liberals favor dumping the former Vice President for Cuomo.

The second Photoshop™ is Cuomo set in a scene from the Netflix movie Uncut Gems starring Adam Sandler, a New York City jeweler always on the lookout for the next big score.  The quote from the film, “This is how I win” became a viral meme.
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Saturday, April 4, 2020

Saturday Satire



What Did The President Know 
And When Did He Know It?





 
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