It Smacks Of Conceit

Four years ago, former President George W. Bush insisted he would not attack his successor.  “I don’t think it’s good for the country to have a former president undermine a current president; I think it’s bad for the presidency for that matter.”

"Secondly, I really have had all the fame I want," he added. "I really don't long for publicity. And the truth of the matter is in order for me to generate publicity I'd have to either attack the Republican Party, which I don't want to do, or attack the president, which I don't want to do. And so, I'm perfectly content to be out of the limelight." 

Yesterday, the National Journal’s Tom DeFrank tweeted the following:

Bush 43 on Trump: "Sorta makes me look pretty good, doesn't it?" - per @nationaljournal's Tom DeFrank pic.twitter.com/X0KBDdDQdw

— National Journal (@nationaljournal) March 6, 2018

In October of 2017, the former president defended the ideas of globalism, free trade, and free markets as well as foreign interventionism around the world in a speech at the George W. Bush Institute.

Bush indirectly accused Trump of fueling dangerous ideologies that threaten the unity of the United States and global stability.  His decision to publicly criticize Trump’s presidency is curious after he made a point of not challenging Obama’s disastrous time in office.

Bush has had a burr under his saddle ever since then-candidate Trump steamrolled his brother during the New Hampshire primary when he said, “Jeb Bush is a low-energy person.  For him to get things down is very hard.”  And who can forget the pitiful moment in New Hampshire when Jeb begged for applause saying, “Please clap.”

So, what would cause Dubya to suggest President Trump’s administration “sorta makes me look pretty good?”

Over the weekend at a fundraiser in Florida, the President mocked Bush the Younger’s intellect and compared his decision to invade Iraq to “throwing a big, fat brick into a hornet’s nest. Here we are, like the dummies of the world, because we had bad politicians running our country for a long time. That was Bush. Another real genius. That was Bush," Trump joked.

Neither Jeb nor Dubya or their daddy attended the 2016 Republican National Convention and all three voted for Granny Clinton.

On January 20, 2009 Bush eased into an existence of purposeful inconspicuousness. He wrote a book, as most past presidents do, learned to paint and said nothing controversial.  Now he’s being exalted thanks to his slams against the Trump Administration.

You know things are bad when George W. Bush starts sounding like a member of the Resistance. https://t.co/OoGOjcVzfq

— George Takei (@GeorgeTakei) February 27, 2017

Jeb Bush To Be Secretary Of Low Energy In Trump Administration

Donald J. Trump’s transition team, headed by Vice President-elect Mike Pence is moving quickly to assemble leaders of the new administration.

The New York Times is reporting that in addition to the announcement on Sunday that Reince Priebus had been appointed White House Chief of Staff and Stephen Bannon as Chief Strategist and Senior Counselor, John Bolton and Rudy Giuliani were under consideration as Secretary of State and Sarah Palin Interior Secretary.

What the Gray Lady missed apparently was the news that Jeb Bush would fill the office of Secretary of Low Energy.

NOTE FROM OUR ATTORNEY:  There is no such cabinet post.

My Daddy Said I Could Be President

Jeb Bush entered the 2016 presidential election cycle with a plan.  The plan was to push aside the twice failed Mitt Romney.  Once he stepped aside, it was assumed everyone else, including Marco Rubio, would do the same.

The plan counted heavily on Bush’s record as the governor of Florida, but nothing took into account the candidacy of Donald Trump.

Bush confidants Sally Bradshaw and Mike Murphy were oblivious to the New York real estate mogul who launched his campaign just one day after Bush launched his.

Jeb struggled mightily to paint himself as his “own man”.  He never had a chance.  He met his Waterloo trying to defend his brother’s policies during an interview with Megyn Kelly when she asked, “On the subject of Iraq…obviously very controversial.  Knowing what we know now, would you have authorized the invasion?”

Jeb answered, “I would have, and so would have Hillary Clinton, just to remind everybody, and so would have almost everybody that was confronted with the intelligence they got.”

Asked if he thought it was a mistake Bush answered, “In retrospect the intelligence that everybody saw, that the world saw, not just the United States was faulty. And in retrospect, once we invaded and took out Saddam Hussein, we didn’t focus on security first. And the Iraqis, in this incredibly insecure environment, turned on the United States military because there was no security for themselves and their families. By the way, guess who thinks that those mistakes took place as well? George W. Bush. Yes, I mean, so just for the news flash to the world, if they’re trying to find places where there’s big space between me and my brother, this might not be one of those.”

His response was disastrous.  During that week Jeb changed his answer five times.  Each walk-back answer was clumsier than the one before it. 

Even before the first debate in August, Jeb commented that immigrants who come to the United States illegally did so as an “act of love”.  Failing to calculate the blowback from that comment, Bush found himself being peppered with questions from reporters.  His “comebacks” never seemed to materialize.  By late August, Trump painted Bush as a “low energy” candidate.  The moniker stuck.

Bush finished in sixth place in the Iowa Caucuses.  Then came New Hampshire which his campaign deemed was “make or break”.  Poor Jeb placed fourth behind Kasich and Cruz.  The iconic moment of his campaign came when Jeb literally begged for applause saying, “Please clap.”

Jeb saw his campaign logo mocked to a fare-thee-well.  The exclamation point at the end of his name began to appear limp and later changed to a question mark.  By then the die was cast and the nation’s attention was turned to South Carolina.  Bush pulled out all the stops.  He brought in his 90-year-old mother Barbara Bush.  On the eve of the South Carolina primary he brought in George and Laura Bush to rescue his campaign.  When he lost on primary night he dropped out of the race.

Jeb spent $150 million in his bid for the presidency and failed miserably.

Now Jeb is making a pathetic attempt at being relevant as the GOP convention nears.  The pain of being trounced so soundly is showing.

Earlier this week, Jeb was interviewed on MSNBC saying the “tragedy” of Trump’s nomination is that “there isn’t going to be a wall built and Mexico’s not going to pay for it.  And there’s not going to be a ban on Muslims…This is all like an alternative universe…People are going to be deeply frustrated and the divides will grow in our country…I think people are really going to feel betrayed.”

Furthermore, baby Jebby asserted that Pope Francis intervened in American politics.  He was referring to the Mass held at the US-Mexico border.  Bush, who is Catholic, said he [the Pope] had every right to preach the Gospel there, but “I don’t think he should be intervening.  I don’t know if he understood that he was intervening in our political affairs.”

It wasn’t enough that Jeb got to spout off on MSNBC; he penned an editorial for The Washington Post. 

“While he has no doubt tapped into the anxiety so prevalent in the United States today, I do not believe Donald Trump reflects the principles or inclusive legacy of the Republican Party. And I sincerely hope he doesn’t represent its future.” 

“As much as I reject Donald Trump as our party leader, he did not create the political culture of the United States on his own.” 

“Eight years of the divisive tactics of President Obama and his allies have undermined Americans’ faith in politics and government to accomplish anything constructive. The president has wielded his power — while often exceeding his authority — to punish his opponents, legislate from the White House and turn agency rulemaking into a weapon for liberal dogma.” 

“In turn, a few in the Republican Party responded by trying to out-polarize the president, making us seem anti-immigrant, anti-women, anti-science, anti-gay, anti-worker and anti-common-sense.” 

“The result has been the vanishing of any semblance of compromise or bipartisanship in our nation’s capital. Simple problems don’t get solved. Speeches happen; the important stuff doesn’t. The failure of elected leaders to break the gridlock in Washington has led to an increasingly divided electorate, which in turn has led to a breakdown in our political system.” 

“Unfortunately, the understandable anger and fear haven’t given rise to a resurgence of purpose in politics or renewed a debate in our party about how Republicans win back the White House with the power of our ideas.” 

“Instead, they have given rise to the success of a candidate who continues to grotesquely manipulate the deeply felt anger of many Americans. Trump’s abrasive, Know Nothing-like nativist rhetoric has blocked out sober discourse about how to tackle America’s big challenges.” 

“And, on the left, Hillary Clinton promises to continue the disastrous foreign and economic policies of the Obama administration, as well as its hyper-partisanship. She has gone as far as to say Republicans are her “enemy” — a clear sign she doesn’t have any more interest in doing the hard work of forging consensus than her former boss does.” 

Jeb's New Logo

Jeb E. Coyote (Beep Beep)

Jeb Bush suffered through a series of humiliations that made up his campaign for president.  He often reminded me of Wile E. Coyote devising elaborate contraptions with materials purchased through the Acme Corporation which always backfired.

The Bush Team tried every trick they could think of rather than bend to the political winds. His mother, former first lady Barbara Bush, implored voters to side with her son. George W. Bush joined him in South Carolina to battle his brother’s nemesis.

Voters deemed Jeb too old-school for a party surging toward a new identity.

“The people of Iowa and New Hampshire and South Carolina have spoken and I really respect their decision,” said Bush, who grew emotional as he announced he would end his run for the White House.

A Shock To The System

Dan Riehl of Breitbart.com shared the substance of a recent interview with Pat Caddell in which he said, “Cruz’s or Trump’s election would be a shock to the system.”

Caddell continued, “We are seeing the transformation of the paradigm of politics. All the old rules are failing. All the old assumptions don’t work. And we have a new set of assumptions evolving. And we have a public that no longer seems to want to eat the dog food that the establishment has dished out and are, in fact, going for choices that are outside the boxes of our ordinary politics.”

Nine months ago the conventional wisdom was that Jeb Bush and Hillary Clinton would win election easily. “The country,” Caddell noted, “is saying we want something different.  And we want to take back…most importantly, reclaiming our sovereignty.  People seem to have gone from being passive observers to active participants.”  Caddell believes that many people who usually don’t vote will come out this election cycle.

Byron York, Chief Political Correspondent for The Washington Examiner, attended the rally in North Charleston, SC Monday night.  Former president George W. Bush and wife Laura were the star attraction in an effort to boost Jeb’s floundering campaign.

York interviewed 41 attendees.  I gathered from his report that most were there to see the former president who is beloved by South Carolinians.  As he interviewed them it became obvious that their love for W doesn’t transfer to his brother Jeb.

When York asked whether, looking back, going to war in Iraq was a mistake, seventeen said yes, it was a mistake. Seventeen said no, it was not a mistake. And seven said some variation of, "It's complicated."

Many of those who said the war was a mistake took care to add that they thought W did the best he could with the information he had at the time. Many of those who said it wasn't a mistake said they don't necessarily approve of it today, as they look back, but they don't want to apply 20/20 hindsight and criticize a decision made 15 years ago. Some blamed today's mess on Barack Obama. In other words, no matter what they said, they were inclined to cut W some slack.

Some of the "It's complicated" people seemed truly torn by the question. In the end, he came away with the impression that most of them didn't really disagree with each other very much. Some of them leaned a little more to the "mistake" side than others, but none of them were in a mood to blame the former president sitting on the stage.

South Carolina Republicans place a lot of value on loyalty. Many have supported the Bush family over the years, and they'll always feel warmly toward any candidate named Bush. But their feelings about Jeb just don't rise to the level of their devotion to W. It's hard to imagine that changing in the few days left before the South Carolina primary.

During last Saturday’s GOP debate, Marco Rubio responded to Donald Trump’s statement that “the World Trade Center came down during your brother’s reign.  Don’t forget that.”  During the heated exchange between Bush and Trump, Marco Rubio said, “I just want to say, at least on behalf of me and my family, I thank God all the time it was George W. Bush in the White House on 9/11 and not Al Gore. And you can—I think you can look back in hindsight and say a couple of things, but he kept us safe. And not only did he keep us safe, but no matter what you want to say about weapons of mass destruction, Saddam Hussein was in violation of UN resolutions, in open violation, and the world wouldn’t do anything about it, and George W. Bush enforced what the international community refused to do. And again, he kept us safe, and I am forever grateful to what he did for this country.”

I believe, just as many others do, that Rubio’s response was not intended to answer Trump’s charge but was a play for the Jeb vote.

Jeb’s polling numbers are in single digits.  He’s shown no inclination to drop out of the race and may be stubborn or prideful enough to stick it out until after Super Tuesday when Alabama, Alaska, Arkansas, Colorado, Georgia, Massachusetts, Minnesota, Oklahoma, Tennessee, Texas, Vermont and Virginia all go to the polls.

Former president Bush’s appearance in South Carolina seemed more like Jebland giving itself permission to say to his supporters “we did all we could”.

Livestreaming: Jeb Bush Rally Featuring President George W. Bush North Charleston, SC

Mean Tweets: South Carolina GOP Debate Pig Pile Edition

They're fighting, Dickerson. Get outta the way, this is what we tuned in for!

— Dan McLaughlin (@baseballcrank) February 14, 2016

Can we go back to the GOP color being blue? The debate stage looks like a meeting of the 20th Congress of the Communist Party #GOPDebate

— jon gabriel (@exjon) February 14, 2016 

 

Un poquito. It went by too fast for me, but I gather others are questioning its fluency. https://t.co/hCsbk7WAXH

— John Podhoretz (@jpodhoretz) February 14, 2016

@jpodhoretz You speak Spanish??

— Sean Davis (@seanmdav) February 14, 2016

If I'm Marco Rubio, I challenge Ted Cruz to a 1 v 1 debate on Univision, en espanol, right now...

— Buck Sexton (@BuckSexton) February 14, 2016

The great thing about Kasich is that he is cooling off the venue with his hand waving. #AirFlow #GOPDebate

— Caleb Howe (@CalebHowe) February 14, 2016

I think what they get out of me is GIGANTIC, TERRIFYING HAND-PADDLES.

— Matt Welch (@MattWelch) February 14, 2016

#GOPDebate It's hard to focus on what Kasich is saying because Trump's not interrupting, the crowd isn't booing, and also I'm not listening.

— Caleb Howe (@CalebHowe) February 14, 2016

Every day I worry that I lost my human sleeping pill in Martin O'Malley, I thank the man upstairs for Ben Carson.

— Harry Enten (@ForecasterEnten) February 14, 2016

Ben Carson, would you like to take a minute to mumble aimlessly and think about butterflies?

— The Scandalous DJT (@AceofSpadesHQ) February 14, 2016

"Rosie O'Donnell--you know, that broad says some good things about 9/11, even though she's a fat pig" -- Donald Trump

— John Podhoretz (@jpodhoretz) February 14, 2016

Any time Trump gets in the weeds he sets fire to Bush. I realize you know this. I just like saying it. #GOPDebate

— Caleb Howe (@CalebHowe) February 14, 2016

blockquote class="twitter-tweet" data-lang="en">

I think Trump just won Michael Moore's vote. #GOPDebate

— jon gabriel (@exjon) February 14, 2016

for those of you insisting Trump will self-destruct, eventually:

You may finally be 100% right.

— The Scandalous DJT (@AceofSpadesHQ) February 14, 2016

Mean Tweets: Jeb Bush Edition

Ceaseless talk of Jeb Bush proves him to be leading candidate for jester in the court of American plutocracy.

— DPRK News Service (@DPRK_News) January 15, 2016

Hereditary fool Jeb Bush compared to a weakling son of greater fathers by Donald Trump.

— DPRK News Service (@DPRK_News) January 15, 2016

Jeb's done. So...Neil 2020?

— Andrew Klavan (@andrewklavan) January 15, 2016

Congratulations to Jeb Bush on his first applause line since 1999. #GOPdebate

— Andrew Klavan (@andrewklavan) January 15, 2016

BREAKING: Dude With Chick's Name Endorses Guy With No Last Name

— Cuffy (@CuffyMeh) January 15, 2016

Jeb Unveils New Campaign Logo

A Princess Destined To Become A Warrior

The “Jeb Can Fix It” Tour began Monday morning in Florida at the Tampa Garden Club for the candidate who is currently garnering a measly 8% in the latest NBC/Wall Street Journal poll.

Bush rather bizarrely told the audience, “If Lincoln were alive today, imagine the foolishness he would have to suffer.  Advisers telling him to shave his beard.  Cable pundits telling him to lose the top hat.”

He continued, to the amusement of the crowd, that he’d gotten advice too; to ditch his glasses, change ties, nail that zinger, be angrier and hide his inner wonk.  But he said, “I can’t be someone I’m not” and “getting things done isn’t about yelling into a camera or regurgitating sound bites free of substance.”

The tour and the release of his e-book, “Reply All Today,” reflect a ridiculous effort to jumpstart a campaign that many say has been flailing, after tumbling poll numbers and a widely panned debate performance.

He boldly declared, "I’m putting The Beltway on notice.  I’ll turn Washington DC upside down, too.”

The memes came pouring forth about Bob the Builder taking over for hapless Jeb because he has wilted under the taunts of Donald Trump and the rise of Rubio.

Bush has also acknowledged that he has to get better at debating and stumping. “I’m a grinder,” he told reporters during a campaign appearance in Iowa on Saturday. “I’m going to get better. I know I have to get better.”

Keep telling yourself that honey.

If you PAID someone for #JebCanFixIt you deserve everything that's coming to you. #JebShouldDeepSixIt

— Michelle Malkin (@michellemalkin) November 2, 2015

Battle Royale: The CNBC GOP Presidential Debate

Tonight as the GOP presidential candidates converge at the University of Colorado-Boulder to debate the nation’s economy the stage has been set for far more than just a debate.  It’s going to be a battle royale.

John Kasich is fed up.  “I’ve about had it with these people.  I’m sick and tired of listening to this nonsense and I’m going to have to call like it is in this race…I’m done being polite,” he said.

A few days ago Donald Trump insisted on taking credit for a business move made by Ford Motor Company that he had absolutely nothing to do with and was decided on nearly four years ago.  Kasich pushed back tweeting, “Together Ohio brought Ford back from Mexico.”  Ford spokeswoman Kristina Adaminski flatly refuted Trump’s claim.

Kasich and the Ohio legislature have been working hard to stop the migration of automobile manufacturers from his state to Mexico and are trying to prevent a move by General Motors.  Trump stopped tweeting and talking about Ford immediately.

Marco Rubio has raised the ire of Floridians for having missed more votes than any other senator this year.  His seat is “regularly empty for floor votes, committee meetings and intelligence briefings.”  He has said in veiled words that he hates his job as senator.  One editorial in the Sun Sentinel suggested, “If you hate your job Senator, follow the honorable lead of House Speaker John Boehner and resign.”

And Jeb is a miserable guy citing the yuuuuuge amount of aggravation he never signed up for in this election cycle saying, “I’ve got a lot of really cool things I could be doing instead of being miserable listening to people demonize me.” I’d bet the farm that Jeb regretted saying that the moment the words left his whiny little lips.

Miss Lindsey confessed his wonderment earlier in the week:  “On our side, you’ve got the No. 2 guy [who] tried to kill someone at 14, and the No. 1 is high energy and crazy as hell. How am I losing to these people?”

Lindsey Graham was also the first celebrity bartender for CNN’s Politics On Tap pouring beers and playing the “Fuck, Marry, Kill” party game with Dana Bash who gave Graham three choices:  Hillary Clinton, Carly Fiorina, and Sarah Palin.

"Sarah Palin—we'll go hunting on our first date," he said. Next was "marry," an easy joke set-up. "Carly, because she's rich," said Graham.  When Bash pressed, and asked Graham if he would erase the existence of Hillary Clinton, he was ready with the punch line.

"No, but is she rich? She said she was flat broke."

The debate will be broadcast live on CNBC, CNBC.com and in the CNBC apps.  The moderators are Carl Quintanilla, Becky Quick and John Harwood.

Elect Trump If You Want That

As of this week, Jeb Bush continues to languish at 7% in the polls nationwide. Only 12% of Republican voters expect him to win the nomination, according to the most recent ABC News/Washington Post poll. 

Despite his campaign’s best efforts to make him appear robust and invulnerable, the miserable truth is Jeb has done zilch to sway voters or his bundlers that he actually possesses the appetite to be president.

"If this election is about how we're going to fight to get nothing done, then…I don't want any part of it. I don't want to be elected president to sit around and see gridlock just become so dominant that people literally are in decline in their lives. That is not my motivation," he said, according to CNN.

"I've got a lot of really cool things I could do other than sit around, being miserable, listening to people demonize me and me feeling compelled to demonize them. That is a joke. Elect Trump if you want that," Bush added.

Less than 24 hours before, Bush's campaign announced a major reshuffling of its resources, saying it was cutting some salaries by 40% and letting go of some people in order to shift more focus on the campaign's ground game in the early voting states.

As for the whisper campaign that his bid for the presidency is going the way of Scott Walker, Bush said, “Blah, blah, blah, blah.  That’s my answer.”

Jeb needs to come to the realization that everyone except Dr. Ben Carson and Donald Trump are still at the Kids’ Table.

Please get out of the race Jeb! 

Exotic Animals of the 2016 Campaign

The Jeb Bushbaby is a subspecies of Bushgeorgicus Americanae, or "little night monkeys" in Afrikaans, which can be found in Florida, Texas and occasionally as far north as Massachusetts. The typical Jeb Bushbaby migrates to a particularly cramped 3,000 sq. ft. lair in Kennebunkport during the summer months. Bushbabies have exceptional jumping abilities: into races, between positions, to conclusions and 'the gun'.

Adult males maintain separate territories, which overlap with those of the female social groups, BushBarbarae Americanae. Males defer to the alpha female with surprising regularity.

Jeb Bushbabies learn largely by scent, communicating by marking their paths with urine. By following the scent of urine, they can land on exactly the same branch every time. This may explain their affinity for the unpleasantly malodorous Common Core. This may also explain more than one embarrassing press conference!

Affable and friendly, the Jeb Bushbaby is not unpleasant to have around, but the cumulative effect of their communication could gag a maggot.

Exotic Animals: Collect the whole set!
Chris Crizzlie
Joe Bydena
Donald Trumpetfish
Bernie Panders
Hillarymadillo
Mike Huccameleon