Friday, August 23, 2019

CNN’s High Horse Has Been Put Out To Pasture

It was just yesterday that CNN's “Tater” Stelter was caterwauling about the hiring of former White House Press Secretary Sarah Sanders as a Fox News contributor and Sean Spicer as a new cast member on ABC's Dancing with the Stars. 
This morning CNN announced via a tweet from Senior Media Reporter Oliver Darcy that the cable network has hired disgraced former FBI Deputy Director Andrew McCabe as a contributor.

I’m just spit-balling here, but I imagine the job interview was fairly matter of fact:  Do you hate President Trump with every fiber of your being?  Did you leak confidential information to this network?  Have you repeatedly lied like a rug?  Alrighty then, when can you start?

Why would the most reliable source of fake news hire this corrupt little weasel?  Internal polling showed that 1 out of 3 CNN viewers are just as stupid as the other two.

McCabe will fit in nicely with Don Lemon who has been accused of assaulting someone in a New York bar “vigorously rubbing his genitalia, removing his hand and shoving his index and middle fingers into the victim’s mustache and under his nose with aggression and hostility.”

McCabe was Peter Stzrok and Lisa Page’s “insurance policy” in the Trump-Russia collusion hoax.  So, just like Fredo Cuomo’s promise to fuck up a guy’s world, he’s in sleazy company.

Oh, speaking of mafioso tactics, there’s the incident involving CNN’s April Ryan whose bodyguard violently ejected a journalist who was covering her speech at the Fourth Annual New Jersey Parent Summit recently.

What’s next for the cable laughingstock?  Hiring O. J. Simpson as an expert on civility and anger management?

NOTE FROM OUR ATTORNEYS:  That survey about CNN’s viewers is satire not fact.  Sorry if you’re disappointed.  Not sorry for the funny.

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