Monday, November 25, 2019

You’ll Never Be This Cool

When Tesla unveiled its new pickup truck last Wednesday, critics blasted it as ugly and impractical.  Despite those criticisms, more than 200,000 people plunked down a $100 deposit to reserve a spot in line for the new vehicle.

The stripped-down model starts at $39,000 with a range of 250 miles while the high-end model has a range of 500 miles.  The $69,000 Cybertruck boasts three motors and can go from 0 to 60 in 2.9 seconds.

Those folks, bless their hearts, think having a Cybertruck sitting in their driveway makes them cool.  They’ll still have to sit in traffic, deal with road rage and buy a new set of tires every so often.

They will never be as cool as the kid who ponies up for a landspeeder.

The X-34 landspeeder is built with a powerful repulsorlift engine which pushes against gravity augmented with three air-cooled thrust turbines capable of hovering up to a meter off the ground capable of speeds up to 250 kph.  Owners can choose from either an open-air or sealed cockpit.  The landspeeder can be fitted with blaster cannons.

There’s no need to look for charging stations.  No need to have a charging station installed for your home which can set you back up to $3,000.

Owning a landspeeder would quiet all the “woke” climate nazis too. The anti-gravity technology is created from subnuclear “knots” of space-time acquired from black holes giving them a range of 75,000 kilometers.

Elon Musk, eat your heart out.

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