He Showed His Complete Incompetence On The National Stage

Former Colorado Gov. John Hickenlooper (who?) withdrew, via video, from the contest for the Democratic presidential nomination Thursday morning.

“’Hick’ plopped down on some stranger’s porch out in the middle of Iowa with a cameraman in tow and read his prepared statement with all the canned passion we’ve come to expect from him, about all the serious thought he will give to a Senate run,” noted Colorado Peak Politics.

Hickenloser, er, Hickenlooper was never named by likely caucus-goers as their first choice as the Democrat nominee for President.  That’s an insult Jay Inslee and Gov. Steve Bullock managed to avoid.

Even in Colorado, where he is allegedly well-known among Democrats, he received just 7% of the vote in a Public Policy Polling survey.

There was so little grassroots appetite for his candidacy that, four months into his campaign, he had reportedly amassed only 13,000 individual donors. At the time, an anonymous source reported staff informed Hickenlooper his campaign was on pace to run out of money by the end of August.

Democrats are frantic.  Colorado is a must-win for them if they want to take back control of the Senate.  Sixty-one percent of Democrats think Hickenloser has the best chance of unseating Republican Senator Cory Gardner in the general election.

There’s just one teeny, tiny little problem.  Hickenlooper is on record saying he doesn’t want to be a senator and “I don’t think that’s my calling.”  There’s even a video of him declaring, “the Senate doesn’t attract me.  If the Senate’s so good, how come all those senators are trying to get out?”

If the GOP is clever, they’ll take those clips of Ol’ Hick and whip up an attack ad or two to rub his nose in it.

INTERNATIONAL NEWS: Former Governor OF US Province of Colorado, Johnathan Hicklooper, was running for 2020 US Presidency for some reason. Story developing. pic.twitter.com/usXdemE0WG

— DPRK News Service (@DPRK_News) August 15, 2019

Basta La Vista Creepy Porn Lawyer

At 5:50 PM Wednesday afternoon, the scandal sheet TMZ published a report revealing creepy porn lawyer Michael Avenatti had been arrested on charges of felony domestic violence.

Avenatti was released after posting $50,000 bail, at which point, he made a brief public statement claiming he would be “fully exonerated” following an investigation.

We can confirm that today LAPD Detectives arrested Michael Avenatti on suspicion of domestic violence. This is an ongoing investigation and we will provide more details as they become available.

— LAPD HQ (@LAPDHQ) November 15, 2018

Initial reports said the woman involved was Avenatti’s estranged wife Lisa Storie-Avenatti however her attorney disputed the report saying, “Ms. Storie-Avenatti was not subject to any such incident on Tuesday night. Further, she was not at Mr. Avenatti’s apartment on the date that this alleged incident occurred. My client states that there has never been domestic violence in her relationship with Michael and that she has never known Michael to be physically violent toward anyone.”

The woman who actually was involved in the alleged physical altercation reportedly scrambled from the apartment where the incident occurred and was spotted on the sidewalk holding her hands over her eyes while shouting into her cell phone. “I can’t believe you did this to me.”

Five minutes later, Avenatti arrived at the apartment complex and yelled repeatedly, “She hit me first,” then, “This is bullshit, this is fucking bullshit.” The alleged melee occurred after the woman attempted to pick up her belongings and called 911 after tempers ran hot.

“We’re told her face was ‘swollen and bruised’ with ‘red marks’ on both cheeks,” TMZ reports. 

While the creepy porn lawyer is attempting to burnish his credentials as a potential 2020 Democrat presidential candidate, he is facing mounting legal entanglements, including a possible criminal investigation by the Justice Department. Senate Judiciary Committee Chairman Chuck Grassley (R-IA) has asked for a criminal investigation into whether Julie Swetnick and Avenatti conspired to provide false statements to Congress and obstructed a congressional investigation during the confirmation process for Supreme Court Justice Brett Kavanaugh.

Grassley wrote in a letter to the Justice Department that Swetnick and Avenatti made serious allegations that required significant resources to investigate. However, Grassley says information from media interviews and elsewhere indicates their statements “likely contained materially false claims.”

The Vermont Democratic Party canceled Avenatti's appearances for Friday and Saturday following his arrest, and it will refund all ticket sales, according to VDP Communications Director Christopher Di Mezzo.

The decision to cancel the events was made "almost immediately after the news broke," he said.

The creepy porn lawyer’s aspirations may just have suffered a setback.  What a pity. (stifles laughter)

UPDATE:  Welcome readers of Bad Blue Uncensored News. We wish to thank Doug Ross for linking to this post.