That Was A Rake You Stepped On Honey

CNN scripted reader Alisyn Camerota got a little snotty on Tuesday following a brief report about a severe hailstorm hitting the Cheyenne Mountain Zoo in Colorado Springs, CO.  She wondered how some people still don't think "climate change is necessarily happening."

Fellow scripted reader John Berman alerted viewers about large chunks of hail that hammered the area on Monday, killing two animals at the zoo and injuring 14 people.

Camerota frowned at the footage of hail splashing into the water at a bear habitat and remarked sarcastically, "Is it August in Colorado as well?"

"I believe it has reached August there," Berman said.

Insane video of baseball size hail hitting the bear exhibit at Cheyenne Mountain Zoo this afternoon. Such a scary situation for all of the people and animals involved. Video credit: Christine Barkalow #cowx pic.twitter.com/LeC1tKzkb9

— Jessica Lebel (@JessicaLebelWX) August 7, 2018

Those who worship at the altar of anthropogenic climate change are convinced the global relevance of hail and a worldwide warming climate increase the chances of hailstorms and morons like Camerota spit out climate change drivel robotically.

Erie Insurance published a report stating, “Each year, hailstorms lead to crop and property damage across the United States. While every state can be the target of a hailstorm, some states are more at risk than others.”

“Landlocked states in the Great Plains and the Midwest are most frequently impacted by hailstorms. That’s because hail commonly occurs in regions where the air’s freezing altitude dips below 11,000 feet.”

“The region where Nebraska, Colorado and Wyoming meet tops the list as the most common location for hailstorms. It is appropriately known as Hail Alley. Hailstorms can occur during the spring, summer or fall months. The majority of these storms appear between May and September.”

And according to 9News.com in Denver, “Hail is something that Coloradans are very familiar with. Part of the Interstate 25 corridor, including Denver, gets more hail storms than anywhere else in the country.”

“A report from the Storm Prediction Center shows the area from the Denver Metro to Colorado Springs gets an average of 13 large hail events every year. That's more than most areas in the Central Plains known as "Hail Alley" and equal to the number of severe hail days in southwestern Kansas.”

“If you count days that any size hail occurs, you could call the Front Range the 'Second Hail Alley'”.

“The Front Range, the High Plains just east of the Rocky Mountains definitely leads the country in those types of days. Anywhere between 12 and 15 days a year in that area,” said Paul Schlatter, a meteorologist with the National Weather Service in Boulder.

Colorado Springs (elevation 6,035 feet above sea level) and Denver (5,280 feet) are both seated much higher than cities like Oklahoma City. This means as hail falls out of a storm below the freezing level, it doesn't have as far to travel down to the ground and so not as much of the hailstone will melt. This is why “Hail Alley” and the “Front Range” get so much more hail compared to other cities; they’re physically much closer to the storm and the hail stays frozen long enough to be damaging.

The geologic age of the Rocky Mountains varies based on location. The youngest parts were uplifted 100 million to 65 million years ago during the close of the Mesozoic Era or what is commonly known as the Age of Reptiles, whereas the older parts rose 600 million years ago.

Al “ManBearPig” Gore predicted the polar ice caps would melt by 2014. Didn’t happen.  If you want to know what the weather will be like tomorrow ask your local weatherman, but if you want to know if it’s going to rain two weeks from now forget about it.  That’s not how the weather works.

I blame those damned dinosaurs for not stopping that cataclysmic asteroid that messed with Earth’s climate for 100,000 years after impact.  No wonder they died out.  Big dummies!

Weather is gonna weather.  Climate change is a natural phenomenon millions of years old.