Because Bill Said So

So far, the shitshow that is the 2016 Democratic National Convention has been unadulterated bedlam.  From tarring and feathering their disgraced chairwoman Debbie Wasserman Schultz and running her out of town on a rail to shouting down Nancy Pelosi at a California delegates breakfast to no pledge of allegiance, the absence of the American flag on stage and no mention of the global threat by the Islamic State, these court jesters have struggled to cajole their base and the viewing audience into believing the Party is unified.

Bernie’s supporters shouted, “Hey, hey DNC, we won’t vote for Hillary.”  They picked up where the delegates at the Republican National Convention left off by chanting, “Lock her up!”  They incessantly shouted, “Bernie!  Bernie!”  His supporters even modified Hillary’s “Stronger Together” signs by blacking out all but a few of the letters to reveal a new message, “Stop Her.”  The hostility between the Clinton idol worshippers and the Berniecrats was palpable.

It is no secret Democrats are mortified Crooked Hillary’s campaign is failing. Her favorability ratings have dipped to their lowest levels in her 24-year-long public career.  Desperate to counter her unfavorability and honesty ratings, the DNC called on their infamous serial rapist to salvage Hillary’s coronation—to humanize her.

To hear Billy Jeff tell it, The Sack Of Russet Potatoes With Earrings is as saintly as Mother Teresa.  “She’s so profoundly kind and tireless and honest and so full of grace she defies gravity.”  I kept waiting for him to give us his trademark lip biting as he spun his fractured fairy tale.  We’re supposed to believe this horse pucky because Bill said so.

I don’t think so Bubba.

#BillClinton: "#Hillary is still the best darn changemaker I have ever known"
She can break a hundred quicker than a hooker w/ a $2 special!

— Mike aka Proof (@ProofBlog) July 27, 2016

For the first time ever, a character witness convention speech urging folks to vote for his wife by a disbarred impeached perjurer.

— Razor (@hale_razor) July 27, 2016