Mere seconds after the big hand was on the 12 and the little
hand was on the 7, the moment the South Carolina polls officially closed,
all the networks and cable news outfits projected a wobbly Joe Biden the winner
in the First in the South primary.
Uncle Joe surpassed Comrade Bernie in the
popular vote in the Democratic primary by a landslide.
Sanders acknowledged Biden’s
victory at a campaign rally in Norfolk, VA saying, “I want to congratulate Joe
Biden on his win tonight, and now we head to Super Tuesday!”
It’s easy for one to
imagine a thought bubble hovering over Bernie’s head with the words, “It took
you three decades to finally win one stinking primary. I’ll get you my pretty and your little dog
too!”
Tom Steyer and his hideous plaid tie got out of the clown car
last night and ended his candidacy.
Pocahontas, emulating Custer’s Last Stand with her
fifth-place finish, is staying in the race.
She proclaimed, “I’ll be the first to say that the first four contests
haven’t gone exactly as I’d hoped…our campaign is built for the long haul.” She’s 1/1024th right.
The woman from the frozen tundra of Minnesota who eats a salad
with a comb refuses to see the writing on the wall. Speaking at a rally in North Carolina,
Klobuchar defiantly declared she has no intention of dropping out before Super
Tuesday. She has trailed every single
candidate except Tulsi Gabbard.
Alfred E. Buttigieg, who back in May of last year said,
“America was never as great as advertised” admitted running for president is “an
exercise in hope and humility.” In his
case, it’s more like an exercise in despair and humiliation.
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