Saturday, March 17, 2018

Dear Hillary, My Boyfriend Told Me To Fall In Line And Post This

While in India to attend the 2018 India Today Conclave, Granny Clinton’s lips were flapping a million miles-a-minute about losing to Donald Trump because backwards rubes were hellbent to Make America Great Again. She claimed white women didn’t vote for her because their husbands, bosses, sons, whoever, said they should toe the line.
Last Sunday she took a little trip down a flight of stairs twice because her sandals had been sabotaged by the Russians.  From the video, it was clear she ripped the seat out of her stretchy pants.  She apparently “sprained” her wrist during her Benny Hill pratfalls.
While staying at the Umaid Bhawan Palace in Jodphur she slipped in the bathtub and fractured her wrist.
The Daily Mail noted she “concealed her injured wrist under a navy shawl.”  They also provided a photograph of the offending bathtub.  No explanation was given for why the 70-year-old boozer felt the need to “conceal” her injury.  It’s just another instance of her compulsive propensity for hiding things from the public.
Why in the world won’t Chelsea and Bill get the crocked crone a Hoveround® scooter?  The good me feels sorry for the feeble-brained ninny.  The bad me just wants to Photoshop™ her crooked, feeble ass.  (Earl, my apologies for “stealing” your hilarious idea.)

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