Tomorrow is
Thanksgiving and the official start of the holiday season and the reason gym
memberships peak in the New Year.
Thanksgiving is
intended to be about gratitude. Charles Manson is grateful he only had to serve
one of his nine consecutive life sentences.
The rest of us are thankful
for the feast of roasted turkey, cranberries in the shape of a can, the
delectable stuffing crammed inside the poor bird’s carcass and, of course, glorious
pies.
Even the dog knows
Thanksgiving is a special day. Sniffing
for tidbits the other 364 days goes out the window. It’s literally raining food: peas roll off the plate, chunks of turkey go
flying on the floor, gravy drips and somebody is always handing food under the
table.
Everybody knows the
bird isn’t the only thing getting stuffed for Thanksgiving. That’s why you need fat pants. Amirite?
Forget about
unbuttoning and unzipping your pants or letting out your bathrobe. You can go in for that third helping of Sweet
Potato Pie and avoid being embarrassed.
Behold, elastic Thanksgiving dinner pants with style.
To allow people to enjoy
more of Thanksgiving in comfort and style, the Stove Top company has designed a
pair of unisex maroon pants with an elastic waistband that can expand up to two
times their original size. But that’s not all: The pants also feature an image
of stuffing that rests right on top of your belly that only the brave can pull
off.
Think I’m kidding?
Stove Top had a limited supply through November 13th and they’re sold out.
Happy Thanksgiving, everyone. Please pass the stuffing.
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