The Martin O'Mallard, (Baltimorus Mayortoasticus), is a dabbling duck which, in this case, dabbles in politics. The mallard was one of the many bird species originally described by Carl Linnaeus in his 18th-century work, Systema Naturae, and still bears its original binomial name, not to be confused with metric, which is more characteristic of Lincolnae Democraticus.
The species is generally found west of the Chesapeake Bay area in the foggy swampland between Maryland and Virginia.
Mallards frequently interbreed with their closest relatives in the genus Anas, such as the American black duck, which accounts for a majority of the Baltimorus taxonomy. The rear of the male is black, with the dark tail having white borders. The bill of the male is generally past due.
A noisy species, the male has a nasal call, not to be confused with a 3AM call.
A generally nondescript waterfowl, the Martin O'Mallard may not be all it's quacked up to be, and may be easily decoyed with promises of cabinet positions.
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