Friday, August 19, 2011

Silly Earthlings

I lumme some science fiction flicks; Star Wars, Star Trek, Alien, 2001: A Space Odyssey, Blade Runner, The Day the Earth Stood Still, E.T.: The Extraterrestrial and War of the Worlds.  Some of the best television sci-fi shows were Earth—The Final Conflict, 3rd Rock From the Sun, V, Space 1999, Battlestar Galactica, Lost In Space, My Favorite Martian, Babylon 5, Star Trek: The Next Generation and, of course, the original Star Trek which aired for just three seasons from 1966 to 1969.  No need to remind you that the show went on to inspire several movies, spinoffs and a bazillion fans.
Why are people fascinated with this genre?  Perhaps it’s the sense of wonder of what’s out there and the fact that it’s hard to define.  It fires the imagination thanks to stellar writers like H.G. Wells, Jules Verne, Isaac Asimov, Arthur C. Clarke and Ray Bradbury to name a few.
SETI (the Search for Extra Terrestrial Intelligence) halted its operations in April of this year after federal and California budget shortfalls. Over 2500 donors have helped SETI resume its hunt for intelligent life with its Allen Telescope Array (ATA).
Speaking to International Business Times, Tom Pierson, who co-founded the SETI Institute with Jill Tarter said, “We are so grateful to our donors.  We believe we will be back on the air in September.”
According to Hello From Earth, one of the messages now headed for the stars reads: “You are cordially invited to an interplanetary barbeque 6:00 p.m. 4, October 2452 at my place. BYO beer and meat. RSVP.”
In September of 2010, it was reported that Malaysian astrophysicist Mazlan Othman had been declared the Head of the Office for Outer Space Affairs by the United Nations to represent earthlings in the inevitable "take me to your leader" moment.
According to Othman, “The continued search for extraterrestrial communication, by several entities, sustains the hope that someday humankind will receive signals from extraterrestrials.” She then went on to state that should we ever hear from aliens, the world should have a coordinated response to that momentous occasion, and argues that “the UN is a ready-made mechanism for such coordination.”
The Guardian, a publication fraught with stupidity, highlights a report that aliens may destroy humanity to protect other civilizations. "A preemptive strike would be particularly likely in the early phases of our expansion because a civilisation may become increasingly difficult to destroy as it continues to expand. Humanity may just now be entering the period in which its rapid civilisational expansion could be detected by an ETI because our expansion is changing the composition of the Earth's atmosphere, via greenhouse gas emissions," the report states.

"Green" aliens might object to the environmental damage humans have caused on Earth and wipe us out to save the planet. "These scenarios give us reason to limit our growth and reduce our impact on global ecosystems. It would be particularly important for us to limit our emissions of greenhouse gases, since atmospheric composition can be observed from other planets," the authors write.

Even if we never make contact with extraterrestrials, the report argues that considering the potential scenarios may help to plot the future path of human civilisation, avoid collapse and achieve long-term survival.

This article was amended on 19 August 2011. The subhead said the report was "for NASA". This has been corrected.

Oliver Morton, co-author of the article admits to making a “horrible mistake.”

So here’s the thing. This isn’t a “NASA report.” It’s not work funded by NASA, nor is it work supported by NASA in other ways. It was just a fun paper written by a few friends, one of whom happens to have a NASA affiliation.
But I do admit to making a horrible mistake. It was an honest one, and a naive one… but it was a mistake nonetheless. I should not have listed my affiliation as “NASA Headquarters.” I did so because that is my current academic affiliation. But when I did so I did not realize the full implications that has. I’m deeply sorry for that, but it was a mistake borne out of carelessness and inexperience and nothing more. I will do what I can to rectify this, including distributing this post to the Guardian, Drudge, and NASA Watch. Please help me spread this post to the other places you may see the article inaccurately attributed to NASA.
Attention Melamakians, Mork from Ork, Gort and all you other wacky, fun-loving aliens:    Stay away from Earth.  We have been overrun by a cult of global warming moonbats whose intelligence quotient retards their ability to park a bicycle straight.

We now return you to your regular programming.


  1. Mazlan Othman is Namhto Nalzam spelled backwards. An alien name if I ever heard one!

  2. @Proof,

    As Al Sharpton would say, "Resist we much."

  3. Mazlan Othman.

    M. Othman.


    Cannot make this stuff up.


Please scribble on my walls otherwise how will I know what you think, but please don’t try spamming me or you’ll earn a quick trip to the spam filter where you will remain—cold, frightened and all alone.


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...